Yesterday was another great day at school.  Liam stayed a lot longer (almost 2 hours) and played most of the time by himself.  He went with the teacher to eat breakfast (without me) and stayed in the classroom for circle time while I sat in the hall.  He had a great time and was totally comfortable.  I was so happy that he was taking everything so well.

Today, he must have sensed that something was up, because from the moment we arrived, he didn’t want to be away from me.  He was happy to play, but only if I played with him.

After about 45 minutes, his teacher wanted to try me going away and coming back later.  He was not happy.  He immediately started to throw a fit, and I didn’t even get to properly explain what was going to happen before they were rushing me out.  (Which I didn’t like, because of course I would prefer to have him happy and relaxed while I was leaving, but at that point, I think I would have just been making it worse by drawing it out.  Besides, we’ve spent lots of time over the past days preparing him for how school works.)

By the time I came back to get him, though, all was well.  He apparently cried a bit when I left, and threw an absolute fit when his teacher tried to get him to have a snack (so they just skipped that for today) but he participated in circle time, and when it came time to play outside, he was very happy.  As a bonus, Benjamin’s class was outside at the same time, so they got to play together, which resulted in two very excited boys (and lots of hugging).

B has still been doing great.  He had a bit of a meltdown yesterday while playing outside when he saw a bee (a new fear after we got several in the house one day last week) but he did much better today.  In fact, he told me that the moment when he saw Liam in the garden today was the best moment of his life and that he will never have a better one.

Although I do hope he does find even better moments in life, I can’t think of anything being better right now than the fact that he feels that way.  I love my guys, and I’m so proud of both of them.

Today was the second day of school. For B, things are still pretty much the same — they haven’t yet gotten much into the Vorschule work yet — the only difference for him so far is getting to play with some of the big kid toys. I did get to chat and share a hug with one of B’s teachers today — I didn’t see her yesterday (extra credit for us because she speaks less English than I do German — considering that, we do pretty well). He is so proud and excited to be in Vorschule. I think he is really loving being one of the “big kids”, but still, he’s pretty used to being at school. He really does love it.

But for Liam, every day for a while will be an adventure. Today started the same as yesterday, with Liam & I playing together and exploring the classroom, but after a bit, the teacher came over and took him off to play on the other side of the room while I watched. He did so well. He put two puzzles together and played with cars. While they were working on the puzzles, he got up a few times to wander off, so Teresa (his teacher) would take him by the hand and bring him back, and he would happily continue. It was pretty neat to watch him be so relaxed and able to focus in this new environment.

While his teacher played cars with Liam and the other children, I got to watch the class for a bit. I really love this school. I’ve seen B’s teachers be kind, attentive, strict and playful, but it was reassuring to see that the same qualities that make me love B’s class exist throughout the school. One teacher sat and played with a girl who was there without her mom for the first time, while another (who speaks no English) worked through a game with a boy (who speaks no German).

Liam’s teacher gradually withdrew from playing with the cars, leaving Liam to play, quite happily, on his own with several other kids from class. It was fun to see him be himself, and play in such a relaxed way, with new kids. He seems very happy.

After we’d been there an hour or so, it was time to go home. He didn’t want to go (and if he had to go, he really wanted to take some toys with him). With reassurances all around that he can go back tomorrow, he reluctantly came with me to change his shoes and head home.

When we got home, I had one very tired guy. We’ll rest up and go again tomorrow. Good progress is being made. (And B can’t wait until Liam is around long enough to play with him in the garden. I can’t wait for that, either!)

Today was the big day — Liam’s first day of preschool (“Kindergarten” in German) and B’s first day of kindergarten (“Vorschule” in German)!  They’ve both been so excited for the past few days, and they woke up with enthusiasm this morning, too — B exclaimed, “It’s the first day of school!” as soon as he woke up this morning, and Liam, after scowling at him groggily for a moment, asked, “Do I get to go to school too?” followed by “Yay!” when we were finally able to answer yes.

After a whirlwind of morning preparations, and a failed attempt at non-blurry pictures, we were out the door and on our way.  As soon as we stepped off the bus at the correct stop, B announced, “Liam, we’re at your school!” even though we couldn’t see it yet (he repeated the announcement once we actually could see the building).

They were so excited to be there together.  B wanted to walk Liam to class, but he was so anxious to get to his own class that, after a quick glimpse at Liam’s classroom door, B was ready to get to his own class and we all went to drop B off at class first.  B was so happy to be there.  He gave his teacher a gigantic hug and then ran off to play with just a quick hug for me before he was off.

Liam was just as enthusiastic.  He greeted his teacher with a “Guten Morgen!” and shook her hand (we’ve been practicing), and then he changed his shoes and hung up his coat and backpack.  He was so happy.  He jumped right into playing with cars, then trains, then Legos, then balls.  He played happily with the other children (although he had no idea what to do when someone took a toy he was playing with) and even announced to a little girl, after they’d been playing together for a while, “You’re a friend!”

I think he’ll do great.  In addition to making a new friend, we discovered that there are at least 2 other English-speaking kids in his class (one of whom is B’s best friend’s little brother) so that should help.  After playing for an hour or so, Liam told me, “I love playing at school!”  I’m so glad that he does.

We only stayed for about an hour, and I stayed with him the whole time (just for today).  But when it was time to go, he didn’t want to leave.  He can’t wait to go back tomorrow.  His teacher gave him a little gift in honor of his first day, and he carried it home himself.

And B is in Vorschule now! He was so excited to get to play with some of the toys set aside for the bigger kids — he got to play with two of the Vorschule toys today (although, when I asked, he couldn’t remember which ones they were).  He was so happy to see his friends and teachers again, and to get to play outside.  He looked for Liam in the garden, but we’d already left by then.  They’ll get a chance to play together soon.

Tomorrow, if all goes well, Liam and I will stay and play for an hour, and then, if he’s still happy, I’ll go away for a short bit before coming back to get him.  We shall see how things progress.  But, for today, I have two very happy, grown up boys.  It was a great first day!

This morning, we had our annual parent/teacher meeting at B’s school.  Unlike last year, when I went into the meeting full of stress and worry because B was struggling, this year I was excited instead to hear about the progress he’s been making.

Dan took the morning off so that we could both be there, and we took Liam along, with the intention of having him join us at the meeting.  When we arrived and dropped B off at his class this morning, Sylvia (the teacher who speaks almost no English) explained that we’d have the meeting just with Stefanie (the teacher who speaks some English).  She also offered to keep Liam in class with B while we had the meeting, which was a fun surprise.  When we asked Liam if he wanted to stay with B, he was so excited that ran off without even a look over his shoulder.  No worries.  No hesitation.

The meeting went great.  We found out that B is doing very well (which we pretty much knew, but it was good to hear it from the teacher).  He seems to finally feel at home in his class.  He plays with his friends (though sometimes they get a little wild), understands most of the German they use with him, faces frustration with more resilience and does many things independently.  He loves going on outings with the class and loves to talk to everyone.  He has really integrated with the group.  He’s young in his class (a July birthday in a system in which the year-end cutoff is September 1) but is now enjoying showing the younger class how things work.  (In his teacher’s words, “He knows he needs to take care of them and really likes to show them how things work.”)  He has a few challenges with some of the fine motor skills they’re working on (using scissors and holding a pencil correctly), but nothing out of the ordinary for his age.  He loves to run and play outside, and is learning patience for skills and games that require him to sit still.  He behaves well and seems to be thriving.  What a difference a year makes.

And though he still struggles a bit with more advanced German communication (he uses many words but not many sentences) his teacher reminded us that since he won’t be staying in German-speaking schools, speaking fluent German really isn’t essential, and it isn’t anything to be worried about.  I needed that reminder.  I focus so much (for myself mostly, but I’m starting to see that I do it with the kids too) on accomplishing things and excelling that I can lose the wider perspective.  In my mind, success in school is a goal for itself, but it doesn’t really need to be.  In reality, the other skills he is learning (patience, resiliency, playing well with others, cooperation, overcoming the massive challenge of being in a school where he doesn’t speak the language or know the culture) are so much more fundamental and beneficial to his life than specifically learning German (which is truly more a fringe benefit to this experience).  He’s doing great.  What he has learned and accomplished has nothing to do with conjugating verbs.  Measuring his success by what matters most, he’s surpassed everything I could have wanted for him by becoming a happily integrated member of his class and by facing each day with enthusiasm for the fun of preschool instead of dreading the challenges.

We thanked the teachers for everything, too.  We’ve accomplished more for Benjamin in the past year and a half, together with his teachers, than I think we could have on our own.  Their persistence and kindness and willingness with him, their lofty expectations for him, their warm welcome to of ALL of us, have all created such a nurturing environment for B.  I feel so lucky to have our kids at this school (and we told them so).

It was a great meeting.

And when we went back to pick up Liam, the boys were playing together with some of Benjamin’s best friends.  They were engrossed with building a wall to a fort out of cushions and didn’t notice us while we watched them.  When they saw us, they both ran up to us for hugs.  Liam didn’t want to go home.  B didn’t want him to go.  Just that — how happy they are to be there — is as good of a status report as any other.