Back to school anxiety . . . for me

Posted on August 18, 2014 by admin

I spent part of Saturday looking through the elementary school curriculum for B’s new school (which is helpfully supplied online). I had finished reading through the list of things which we need to bring to school and filling out the pile of forms required before school starts (emergency contacts, health history, school lunch forms, payment information, authorization for the administration of Potassium Iodide — gotta love life in Austria), and I thought I would take a quick look at what they’re actually going to be working on and trying to achieve this year.

First, let me say that I think teachers are AWESOME. And I mean that literally — I am in awe of them. Looking at this 134 page book on the elementary school curriculum, and realising that each teacher is basically trying to teach 1/7 of that book (the book covered pre-school, kindergarten and grades 1-5) to 30 whole kids every year was overwhelming. *I* was overwhelmed, reading it, and I only have ONE kid to worry about. I have no idea how they manage to teach all of that, plus have snack time, recess, lunch time, field trips, play time and so on . . . plus they deal with sick kids, field questions from parents and do 100 other things that I haven’t even thought of. I don’t know how they do it. (And this is at a well-funded private school with small class sizes.)

As parents do, I read the long list of tasks and goals for the year with Benjamin in mind (and, to a lesser extent, Liam — he’s not attending this school this year, but I’m keeping an eye on what they would be expecting of him at this school if he were going there). I started with the language section, which includes reading, writing, speaking, information collection and use of technology. These include some of the areas where I’m the most concerned about B keeping up with his class. I don’t really have an idea of exactly what’s expected for entrants into first grade at this school, but compared to my friends’ kids of the same age in the US, he’s behind. He’s not reading yet, his writing has only extended to single, capital letters (plus his name). Most importantly, he doesn’t like working on reading or writing at this point. I imagine that reading will sort itself out in the near future (I think that once he’s able to read, he’ll discover the joy of reading, and he’ll be off to the races), but I worry about it being a bit of an uphill battle, especially if he’s behind the curve. (I don’t actually know that he is, though. His school seems confident about his placement.) So, I worry.

And then I took a look at the math curriculum. In math, I’m not worried about him being behind. I’ve always felt like this was a strong skill for him, but I didn’t have much idea of what’s typical for a kid his age. But, he won’t be behind (he’s taught himself most of the skills through 2nd grade in the curriculum already). (And, looking at the kindergarten chart, it looks like Liam’s ahead in math, too.) And, that’s great. But though I would have thought that I would be able to feel great about that, I’m surprised to find that I’m nearly as anxious about the areas he’s way ahead on as I am about the stuff he might be “behind” on. Because, though I’m very impressed that he can add double digit numbers, and that’ he’s starting to do multiplication, now I worry about the challenge of keeping an exceptionally bright math brain (there, I said it) engaged and interested when he’s so far ahead.

I know I’m getting ahead of myself. School hasn’t even started yet. And, I expect to find that the teachers (who, as I’ve previously stated, are akin to super heroes in my eyes) have lots of experience and good strategies, for helping him with the stuff he needs to work on, and keeping him happy about the stuff he’s great at. But, staring into the face of our first year of “real” school, this mom is feeling just a little intimidated by the magnitude of the tasks ahead.

Our summer focus

Posted on August 6, 2014 by admin

Right now, my house is a mess. The vacuuming hasn’t been completely done in weeks. There are massive piles of dirty laundry to be washed and several laundry baskets full of clean clothes waiting to be folded and put away. My kids have been spending a great deal of their time on the iPad lately. I haven’t been getting to the things on my to do lists, and things like blog posts and uploading pictures have been queueing up, waiting to be taken care of. I haven’t had an hour to myself in over 10 days, and last week I realized there had been a 10 day stretch when I didn’t leave the house, not once. Yesterday I locked myself in the bathroom to get 2 minutes — 2 literal minutes — to myself because the requests for water “in the other cup”, for an unbroken graham cracker, and for me to “make my brother stop kicking me” got to be too much at one point.

This sounds awful. Reading that back, I sound like a woman barely clinging to her sanity, about to lose it. Someone who might be suffering from depression or anxiety. Someone in trouble.

But the reality is that the housework is undone because I’ve been prioritizing getting in a walk for me, and an hour at the playground for the boys, every day. It’s been great for all of us. The boys have been spending more time on the iPad because we’ve recently found several educational math and reading games that they absolutely love. I haven’t been getting to the things on my list, writing as many blog posts or sharing as many pictures because I’ve been making a concerted effort to spend more time mentally present with the kids and less time multi-tasking. I decided not to take any time to myself this weekend because things at home were so nice that I didn’t want to go out (though I’m second guessing that choice after hiding in the bathroom yesterday). I hid in the bathroom yesterday because I recognized the signs — anxiousness, irritability, impatience — that I was about to vent my frustration and fatigue on the kids … so I took 2 minutes to myself in the only room that has a locking door. The kids didn’t even notice that I was gone, but I felt much better.

And all of THAT sounds pretty great. But it’s hard, because although I philosophically agree with the choices I’m making, living with the reality of it is a challenge. We’re enjoying our summer, though we aren’t getting much done. And I think that’s great, except when I’m stressing over the length of my to do list. I’m living with a messy house so that we can spend more time outside. Which is wonderful, except when I get twitchy over the dust bunnies. The boys are practicing math and reading. And that’s fantastic, except when I count up the hours of screen time they had yesterday and compare it to my idea of what it OUGHT to have been. I’m focusing on different priorities than I’m used to, shifting my strategy for the summer, and being as loving and nurturing as possible, which feels very good, other than when I’m hiding in the bathroom, which feels a lot like failing. I’m spending my energy on really important stuff, but I’m having a lot of trouble letting go of the other stuff.

On balance, things are pretty great around here right now, but it’s so easy to lose sight of that. I think that one of the hard things about parenting is that failing and succeeding can look a lot alike. That first paragraph looks exactly like so many of the overwhelmed/stressed/ freaking out posts I’ve written, but today it’s about working on feeling grounded, relaxed and focused on things I’m not used to focusing on. Looking around my house right now, it’s easy for me to feel like I’ve dropped the ball on everything, but I don’t think I have — I’m just spending my energy in other areas right now … and I think it’s a good trade.

Also, we’ve stopped B’s afternoon naps because he’ll be in school for a full day by the end of the month. The idea is for him to read or play learning games while Liam naps and while I do things like compose my blog posts. In reality, though, it’s turned into an hour where B sits and asks me questions about learning math or where dragons come from while I attempt to type a variety of increasingly fragmented sentences into my computer. Today’s blog post was composed entirely while teaching double digit addition. That is an underrated super power.

B’s birthday party

Posted on August 5, 2014 by admin

I sat down today to start writing about our summer vacation, and in doing so, mentioned Benjamin’s birthday party (the one with his friends). And then I realized I hadn’t yet written about THAT … and since that came before the vacation, that’s what I’m going to write about today. (And yes, we do a lot for birthdays around here. If you’re counting, B had one birthday party at school, one here with his friends in June — the one I’m about to write about, one day of illness hindered festivity on his actual birthday and one day at the pool with the family, which was supposed to happen ON his birthday but couldn’t due to the aforementioned illnesses. That’s 4. My plan is to start the vacation stories tomorrow. We’ll see if that actually happens.)

Last year, B really wanted to have a birthday party with his friends — his first. He wanted to invite his whole class (20 kids) plus some other friends, which was very sweet but also very impractical. This year, having a better sense of how birthday parties work here, I gave him license to invite 6 kids (one for each year of his age — stole that idea from a friend) … but he didn’t want to. He decided that he only wanted to invite his best friend and his best friend’s little brother (conveniently, also Liam’s best buddy from school). So, that’s what we did.

That changed the feeling of it from a party to more of a playdate with fun decorations and cake, which was actually great because it made the whole thing pretty laid back. The kids played. We parents talked. I encouraged the boys to play a few games we had set up, but mostly they played together really well on their own. The cake turned out pretty well (it was my first time attempting to serve a fondant cake to anyone outside of the family, so I was a little nervous). Good times were had.

My favorite part of the day was during the water balloon game I had invented — which was basically just an excuse to get the boys out onto the terrace and playing in some water on a hot day. There weren’t any rules, just some chalk drawings of pigs (it was an Angry Bird party) as targets for the boys’ water balloons. The idea was to toss the balloons, splash each other and generally to be silly. But it didn’t work that way. As it turns out, I don’t really have any idea how to properly fill water balloons. My first few attempts resulted in a soaked bathroom floor, so I took a conservative approach and didn’t fill them to capacity. Turns out, though, that underfilled water balloons are nearly impossible to break. So, the kids spent about half an hour attempting to break the same balloons over and over again. Every so often they’d manage to get one, but generally, it took 6 or 7 tries per balloon. I was worried they’d tear through them and be finished in 5 minutes, but that wasn’t a problem. It was generally hilarious. Luckily, they enjoyed the process (and the results) enough to not particularly mind. They remained both determined and entertained throughout, everyone got sufficiently soaked, and a good time was had by all.

Pool party

Posted on August 4, 2014 by admin

We finally managed to string enough healthy days together to go to the wave pool to celebrate B’s birthday — 16 days after the big day. When you just turned 6, and you have to wait for 16 whole days to celebrate your birthday while your brother, dad and mom are getting better but you’re feeling fine, it’s pretty tough to be patient and reasonable about it, I think. But B did great. He did get frustrated and cry and say a few angry things to me the third time we had to reschedule, but I completely understand (and I’m honestly glad to see he’s not TOO grown for that up yet).

This past Saturday, though, we were all well, and we had all been well for about 5 days, so we finally went. We finally got to splash and play in the pool. We finally got to go down the water slides. We finally got to float on the inner tube “river”. We finally got to have lunch and ice cream at the pool. We finally got to spend the day celebrating the way the birthday boy wanted to.

We had a wonderful time. We celebrated with our big 6 year old guy. We spent the whole day, all together. I spent some time playing with Liam while Dan played with B, I spent some time playing with B while Dan played with Liam, and we spent some time all playing together. It was a great day. My big kid is 6, we finally got to celebrate, and I could not be happier about it.

Benjamin’s birthday

Posted on July 31, 2014 by admin

Our first day back to “normal” after vacation was exhausting. I really was totally beat by the end of the day — I’d forgotten how much it took out of me to spend the whole day with the kids while simultaneously trying to get some laundry done, unpack from our trip and get everyone fed. Climbing into bed that night was so satisfying. I was so ready for a good night’s sleep.

Alas, it was not to be. B woke up, sick, after an hour. We spent the next few hours bathing B, doing laundry and mopping floors. There’s nothing quite like unscheduled, middle of the night housework! After a rough night all around, we spent the next few days taking care of a sick B and wondering when the illness would strike next.

Benjamin’s birthday was that Friday, July 18. By Thursday night, he was feeling pretty well, so we were hopeful that he would be able to fully enjoy his birthday. I (optimistically) baked a cake, Dan took the day off of work, and we stayed up late wrapping gifts and decorating a bit. We went to bed with our fingers crossed, excited for B’s big day.

But again, it was not to be. Liam woke us up an hour after we’d gone to bed, having his turn at the stomach illness. Again, we were up in the middle of the night, bathing Liam (5 baths in one night!), mopping the floor and laundering tons of bedding. In his case, the illness stretched out until morning, so instead of B waking us up excited and a little too early on his birthday (as is customary), Dan and I were just shuffling back to bed, well after the sun had come up, with our excited newly 6 year old put back to bed, just so we could rest for 1 hour.

Though my enthusiasm for B’s birthday was not diminished in the least, I struggled to have it shine through the haze of exhaustion that hung over later me that morning. My memory of him opening his presents is slightly befuddled by the fact that I hadn’t yet had coffee, but I remember how excited he was. I remember how well he took it when we explained that our celebratory plans for the day (a trip to the wave pool) would have to be rescheduled. He took it so well. He had actually already come to that conclusion on his own. There were no tears, no sad face. Just a quiet, unemotional, matter of fact, “I understand” that was more heartbreaking for how grown up it was.

And the rough start to the day didn’t end there. We bought the wrong squirt gun. It was the gift he had most been looking forward to, and though we got him a nice one, it was not the one he wanted. I got the wrong video game — it wouldn’t play on our console. (I feel like such a “MOM” … I didn’t know “Wii U” was a thing.) And through all of it, he was ok. A bit disappointed, but surprisingly ok.

From there, though, the day got better. He & Dan took a trip to the toy store to exchange the squirt gun (they were out of the one he really wanted, but at least he got to choose the replacement). We got to Skype with some of our family and got a surprise video message from others. He got messages and texts from (literally) around the world. Everyone got a long nap, Liam got three more baths, and B got to pick the movie for movie night. And, shockingly, everyone was well enough for a little bit of cake after dinner.

At the end of the night, Liam, who had not yet given B a gift (Mommy dropped the ball on that one because B had been sick all week), insisted on choosing a gift for B out of the things we already had in the house — which turned out to be one of the biggest hits of the day.

At the end of it all, B said, “I think this turned out to be a pretty good birthday after all.” I think that a higher compliment could not have been given.

Unfortunately, we went on to take turns being quite ill over the next week or so — it’s about 10 days after B’s birthday now, and we haven’t been well enough yet to take that trip to the wave pool, but we will soon. Regardless of how it was spent, B’s birthday was as important and as special as ever to me. It was not at all the day we had planned, but, on balance, it was a good day. I hope he felt celebrated. I feel astonished at his maturity and understanding. He is just so grown up.

For B, as he turns 6

Posted on July 29, 2014 by admin

First of all, how can you be 6?!? I feel like it was just yesterday, or maybe last week, that you were 4, and I’m certain it was no more than a few months ago that you were just 2 or 3. Time flies, as a mommy, and it’s astonishing to watch the speed with which you grow and become more and more a part of the world.

But it is WONDERFUL that you are 6! I love you, turning 6, with my whole heart. You are such an amazing little fellow. Shockingly smart, startlingly observant, with a silly sense of humor and a quiet, kind, and sensitive heart. As you grow, you become increasingly brave, and your energetic enthusiasm and intensely competitive spirit often leave me cringing in the face of whatever new challenge you’ve decided to attack and conquer, but also thrilled to see your spirit encourage you to take on new challenges. You are an amazing brother to Liam, and seeing you enjoy each other’s company and seek each other out as playmates have been some of my favorite moments as a parent so far. You feel things very deeply, my sweet boy, and though I see the difficulty of that at times, I also know how strongly you experience all of the good things that happen in your life, as well.

This has been a big year! You finished your kindergarten year, and have now left preschool behind you. A place that you were reluctant to enter 3 years ago has become a comfortable haven for you, and I am sad to say goodbye to it and to your teachers. You learned a lot there — your German is excellent, and you’ve learned to write all of the letters! You lost your first tooth this year, too, just recently, and you’re working on a second one. You don’t even realize it yet, but you’ve started being able to read a little, which is fun to see, and you absolutely blow us away with your memory, your sense for space and numbers, your creativity, your compassion, and your ability to make connections between ideas. You are a phenomenal boy, and you constantly amaze me. You tell great stories, and you remember EVERYTHING.

And you are getting so tall, so big and strong. You can wash your hands without a step-stool and so often your feet hang over the edge of your bed when you are sleeping. You can run and jump and climb and ski and sled and swim. You are an amazing guy.

I love you so much. You’re growing up and getting bigger, but you will always be my little guy. I love being with you, watching you try new things, listening to the stories that you tell, or just chatting about whatever is on your mind. You are a great kid and a really cool person. I am so glad to know you and incredibly grateful to be your mom. I love you, my wonderful boy. Happy birthday!

The end of the school year . . . and the end of preschool for B

Posted on June 27, 2014 by admin

Yesterday was the last day of school for my boys this year. For B, it was his last day at this school entirely, and his last day of preschool. For Liam, it was the last day of his very first year of school. A big day for both boys! Actually, a big day for all of us.

Next year, B will move on to elementary school. He goes right from half-day preschool/kindergarten to full day first grade. That’s going to be a big change, but he’s excited about it (and, therefore, so am I). Mostly, I think he is beyond excited that his school next year will be in English and that he’ll be able to express himself really well. (He’s also looking forward to learning more math.) Liam will get to come back to his same class and teachers and friends next year . . . which also means we don’t have to completely say goodbye to any of the teachers at the school. (I already have plans to stop by B’s old class next fall to pick up some pictures.)

It’s been a busy week — lots to fit in before the end of the year. B’s class celebrated his birthday with him on Tuesday. I’m so grateful that he got to do that one more time before leaving this school.

And B commemorated the occasion of the end of preschool by losing his first baby tooth the night before his last day. (Just in case there was any question about how grown up he really is getting to be.)

Now we’re on our summer “vacation”. (I say “vacation” because summer means having both boys home, which is wonderful, but not exactly restful.) It has been a long (but very good) preschool journey for B, a great first year for Liam, and a busy week for all of us. Now it’s time to enjoy the summer!

Customary

Posted on June 26, 2014 by admin

Before I moved to Austria, I had only ever lived in a single culture. As such, I believed the rules of etiquette to be fairly ironclad. Allowing for differences between generations, and different class and social backgrounds, there are certain customs and behaviors that I just believed to be GOOD, RIGHT, and POLITE, in an absolute sense, and those that were not.

It’s been an uncomfortable adjustment to realize that’s not true.

The issues that a society emphasizes as polite are pretty arbitrary. Well, probably not entirely arbitrary, because I’m sure they have a history and come from something, but they are incredibly subjective. Things that at home would be incredibly rude, like cutting in line or spitting on the sidewalk, are commonplace here, while things we take for granted in the US as acceptable, like running late for an appointment or wearing yoga pants to the grocery store, are gauche in Vienna.

The little things like that you adjust to quickly (I haven’t worn my yoga pants outside of the house in years — not even to walk the dog), but there are other things that are tremendously difficult to let go of, even though I know they make me weird.

For example, earlier this month, B was invited to a birthday party by a kid in his class. Liam was not. We RSVPed that B would be there (which is weird enough — Austrians don’t really RSVP, and if they do, they don’t feel bound by it, nor any obligation to inform you if their answer changes either way), but didn’t mention Liam, because he wasn’t invited. The party was for the child who last year came to B’s birthday party … unexpectedly (to me) accompanied by his older brother who we had never met. Part of me really wanted to assume that this probably meant that Liam was supposed to be invited to this party, too, but I just couldn’t. Though by Austrian standards, it was probably a safe assumption, I just couldn’t let go of my deeply ingrained reverence for the intention of an invitation. The issue became irrelevant when Liam busted his lip open the day before the party, because he certainly couldn’t attend a McDonald’s birthday party an open wound on his mouth.

But, as it turns out, he WAS “secretly” invited. Well, secret from my perspective. The hosts asked where he was and had a goody bag ready for him. I’m quite certain that an Austrian mom would have read the situation correctly (and, if she hadn’t, no one would have really cared, because while bringing an uninvited child to a birthday party in the US would be a faux pas, it just isn’t a big deal here).

Another example came up this week. It was B’s last week of school, and after 3 years in the same class, I wanted to do something special to thank the teachers. I agonized over gifts (Dan finally helped me think of something good) and spent at least an hour composing heartfelt notes to each teacher in German. But … I don’t think they really do that here. B’s teachers have kind of gotten used to me with the Christmas gifts and the year-end thank you gifts, but I’ve definitely gotten the impression that, although the gesture is appreciated, the strangeness of it makes it a little uncomfortable for them. I’ve checked, and it’s not forbidden or anything that they receive gifts from the parents . . . they just generally don’t.

I give the gifts anyway. I know it’s odd the way I do things, and it’s certainly not my desire to be weird or to make anyone uncomfortable, but I can’t let it go — it’s all I have. I know (reasonably well) how to be polite and gracious as an American. I have very little idea of how to be a polite Austrian. So if I were to stop doing my weird American things, I would JUST be a slightly rude person by Austrian standards. This way, I’m STILL slightly rude by Austrian standards, but I at least get comfort by being reasonably polite by American standards, even if no one else here really gets it.

Dino Lingo

Posted on June 25, 2014 by admin

So first, in the interest of full disclosure, I want to mention that Dino Lingo provided me with their product for free in exchange for a review. I went into this to do an honest review, trying to maintain the perspective of a paying customer.

I’ve never done a sponsored post before. But this product was so perfectly suited to our family (and to my blog audience) that I had to give it a try. Also, the links to Dino Lingo on this page are affiliate links.

Dino Lingo is a language learning program for children. I had never heard of it, but the first thing that impressed me when the company contacted me was the excellent customer service. Every other time that I’ve gotten a message from someone asking me to review something, it has come as a generic form email (which is a lot of the reason why I’ve never followed up before). In contrast, Kathryn from Dino Lingo had done her homework — she had read my blog, and understood why this would be a good fit for us. And the excellent communication and customer service didn’t stop there. Once I decided to give it a try, we had several thoughtful conversations about which language program to choose. We decided against German, since my boys are already pretty experienced with it, and the Dino Lingo program is intended for beginners. I eliminated Spanish for the same reason, and French because, though the kids don’t speak it, I know enough that I wasn’t sure I’d be able to gauge the effectiveness of the teaching in the program myself. We decided to try something completely new to the whole family — we went with Russian. (I was impressed by the range of options available. I expected a fairly standard French/Spanish/German/Italian/Mandarin selection. It is much more extensive than that. They have over 40 options. Our final choice came down to Gaelic and Russian. We went with Russian because the boys often encounter Russian children on the playground, and they can’t communicate with them, which is always a bummer.)

So, our choice was made and we waited. We didn’t wait long, though — our package arrived just 8 business days later, which is impressive for an international shipment. The boys didn’t know what was in the package, but they were so excited to find out! (Dino Lingo very kindly included a second stuffed dinosaur toy, which kept the opening of the package from spurring a fight, earning them even more bonus points for me.)

Our set included 5 DVDs, a set of flashcards, a coloring book, a vocabulary book, posters, a progress chart (with stickers), a music CD and 2 dinosaur toys. The kids were immediately intrigued, and, after running around for 5 minutes with the dinosaurs, wanted to put on the first DVD. So we did.

We put the first DVD on . . . and I was initially a little concerned. My kids are so used to interactive apps on the iPad and the iPhone, and TV shows with really slick presentations. This is a DVD based program, so it isn’t interactive. The graphics are cute, but I wasn’t sure they’d capture the boys’ attention. I was worried that they’d get bored with it quickly and lose interest.

I was wrong.

Not only were they completely captivated by the characters and the graphics, they were totally wrapped up in learning the language. They were sitting on the floor, talking back to the video, right from the start. And when it was over, they asked to watch it again. And again. By the end of that first night, we were all talking about the Russian we’d learned already.

Liam loves the flash cards. He doesn’t play with them in the conventional way (which is probably good, because he’s learned more than I have, so I couldn’t quiz him). Instead, he spreads them out on the floor, picks up the ones he knows, and tells me the words. In Russian! His favorite is “monkey” (обезьяна). The flash cards would be more useful if I were doing a better job of learning Russian myself (or if we had a native speaker we could work with). But he’s figured out a way to be quite entertained. (And hey, he’s 3, and basically teaching himself Russian, so I can’t criticize.)

We received our program about 6 weeks ago, and with the end of the school year this week, and all the craziness that leads up to that, we haven’t used it all that much in the past couple of weeks. But the kids are STILL talking about it. They still remember what they’ve learned. Remarkably, their interest in learning Russian outlasted their interest in the stuffed toys that came with the set. I honestly didn’t expect that. They want to learn more, and they’re so proud of what they know already. We only recently got in to looking at the printed materials (aside from the flash cards) — most of our use has come from the DVDs. But the kids are starting to get interested in the posters, too. (They’re quizzing each other on the words associated with the pictures.)

(Actually, after our time with the program, I have only one criticism. On the first DVD, there is one graphic of a happy face turning around and showing its backside while giggling. It’s not egregious, but slightly rude, and it’s one thing I wish my kids hadn’t learned from the DVD!)

We didn’t buy the set, so we’re extra lucky — it came to us as a gift. But, I can honestly say that I *would* buy it. I wish that we’d had something like the Dino Lingo set in German before we’d moved here. It would have been a leg up, and a great start to our overseas adventure . . . for all of us. I’m truly impressed by how much my kids have learned, and how much they’re enjoying it. It’s been more effective than I expected it to be. Way to go, Dino Lingo, and thanks for sharing your product with us!

Summer schedule

Posted on June 23, 2014 by admin

Most of my time as a parent has been spent either feeling overwhelmed, trying to figure out how to get a handle on things or being pretty certain I’m screwing everything up. (I do other stuff, too, that’s just in the background.) This is a part of parenting that I didn’t anticipate before I became a mom. I knew that the early days with a new baby would be hard (though I didn’t know how hard), but I didn’t know that I would never really get things “figured out” — that I would never get past feeling like a rookie at something I’d been doing for years. The thing is, this game is constantly changing. Every time I emerge from the tunnel of confusion brought on by new schedules, preferences, temperaments, questions, developmental stages, personality changes, and just life in general, I get knocked sideways by a whole new, different set of circumstances that requires a completely new approach. I’m always behind the curve because the rules are always changing. That’s just how it is. Although it’s tough, the upside is the knowledge that however hard a particular stage as a parent is, it will be over soon. The downside is that when things are finally smooth, they’re guaranteed not to stay that way for long.

We’ve been in a surprisingly long period of stability around here recently. Liam has mostly adjusted to school, outgrown his phase of night terrors (more or less — he no longer gets them every night) and it has become almost possible to reason with him sometimes. B has gotten the potty thing mastered, and has gained a surprising amount of independence lately. Most of the time, a family outing no longer requires a stroller, and dinners don’t always end with something being thrown, worn, or dumped on the floor. We’re able to brush teeth at night without major fits (occasionally) and the boys require only constant reminders (and not being chased through the house) to get ready for school. Things have been pretty easy around here for a little while (and by “a little while”, I mean since sometime after Easter).

So, of course, everything is about to change. Today is the first day of the last week of B’s time in preschool. Starting on Friday, I’ll have the boys home until August. And when they do go back to school, Liam will go back to this same school, while B starts at a new school. In the meantime, B, who still takes an afternoon nap most days, needs to get used to not having one, because he starts full-day school in August. But Liam, who turns into Mr. Hyde if he doesn’t nap (and whose night terrors come back if he sleeps too soundly at night, which is well mitigated by not going to bed over tired), still needs a daily nap. And, their shared nap time has historically been when I get a lot of stuff done every day … like writing this blog … so that’s going to require some rethinking. (And, as demonstrated by the fact that I’m still blogging about last year’s summer vacation, taking an extended blogging break doesn’t work too well for me.)

So, later this week, everything changes. (Again.) We’ll go on vacation for a bit, come home, and sort out a summer schedule for the 6 weeks before school starts up again. I’ll convince Liam to nap even though B won’t be, keep B quiet but busy so I can get a little done around the house and sort out an hour or so each day to find time to work on this blog. It might be a challenge, but, in exchange, I get to have my guys home every day for a few months, and that’s going to be great. It’ll be a bit overwhelming, but I’ll get it sorted out. It always is, and I always do.

A Mommy Abroad

Our big adventure, as a family of three.

Category Archives: Kids and Parenting