Walking the Prater

The Prater is a park of about 6,000,000 square meters in Vienna.  It’s made up of 2 completely different parts — one is a wild, crazy, slightly cheesy amusement park, and the other part is the “green Prater”, which is a huge, forested recreation area.  (It’s kind of Vienna’s version of Central Park.)

Last year, we visited the amusement park, and although it was interesting, it wasn’t quite the right fit for the boys — Liam, in particular, was big enough to want to try everything but too little to actually do so.  (It was also shortly after we arrived, so we were probably more chicken to try new stuff than we are now.  We should go back and check it out again.)

The other day, Liam and I went on an expedition to explore the green part of the Prater — something I’d not done with any particular thoroughness.  We walked for over an hour, mostly down the “Hauptallee” (main path) that runs down the middle.

From the depths of the park, you’d have no idea you were in the center of a major city.  It is green, lush and very quiet (cars aren’t permitted).  We saw dogs, horses, bikes, walkers, runners, trees and open spaces.  There were paved paths (very stroller friendly) as well as wood chip covered running/bridle paths.  Most importantly (given how warm it was here t his week) there was lots of shade and plenty of cool breezes.

We’ve been back 3 days this week to walk or run.  It’s a very peaceful break from the bustle of the city, made more surprising by the fact that it’s about halfway home from dropping Benjamin off at school.  We really enjoyed it, and I think we’ll be visiting often.

Benjamin’s new haircut

For each of my boys’ first few haircuts, I did them myself.  Although I worried about cutting them, cutting myself, or mangling their beautiful hair, nothing horrible happened.  Even so, I know that although I have many skills and talents, doing decent hair cutting is beyond me.  (Liam’s, since it’s curly, is a little easier — which I didn’t expect — so I’ll probably be able to do his for a little while yet.)  After those first few, we turned Benjamin over a to a professional.

Here, in Austria, the results have been very uneven . . . . sometimes literally.  (We had much better luck in the States.)  Part of it is a communication issue, to be sure (our meager German doesn’t extend to many haircutting terms, and since most tourists don’t get their hair cut on vacation, the hair stylists don’t always speak a lot of English) and part of it is that I like to keep B’s hair long, and that isn’t the predominant style for little boys here.  So, when I ask them to leave it long, they either take me too literally (did he even have a hair cut?), leave parts of it too long (frighteningly close to a mullet) or kind of ignore our requests and do something long-ish but also kind of non-specific.

Benjamin was due for a hair cut again (funny how that keeps happening) but I realized, this time, that he’s old enough to decide for himself what his hair should look like.  But, how do you ask a 3 year old how he wants his hair?  I tried talking to him about it, but when I asked him, “What do you want your hair to look like?” he said, “Like this” (meaning, the way it already looks), and when I asked him how he wanted his hair cut, he lifted up some of the hair on the top of his head and mimed cutting it, while giving me a look that said, “Is this a trick question?”

So, then I asked him to look at the other kids at school and tell us if he wanted his hair to look like any of theirs.  There’s a wide variety represented, most on the short side, but none of them appealed to him.  So, then Dan (in a moment of brilliant inspiration) Googled images of “little boys hair styles” and let B look through until he found one that he liked.  They showed the picture to the stylist, and although she left it a little longer than the picture (which Mommy is grateful for), it turned out great, and B is very happy.

He’s 3.  He’s still SO little, but he really is big enough to start making some of his own choices.  In addition to picking out his t-shirt every morning, I figure hair style is a good place to start.  No matter what he decides, it’s temporary and it will grow out.  He can experiment with different things, and express himself.  I like his hair long, but I want him to be able to look however he likes, and I want him to have the experience of having the freedom to choose — which will lead to sometimes making decisions he doesn’t like, and then having the opportunity to make different choice next time.

This is the shortest his hair has ever been (not counting his first year when it was just wispy baby hair).  Just looking at it in a picture, I never would have chosen this haircut for him, but now that he’s got it, I love it and I think it’s perfect for him.  It suits him nicely and he’s all ready for summer.  And the smile he gets when I tell him he did a great job picking his hair style is pretty wonderful, too.

A long field trip makes a happy child

A couple of weeks ago, Benjamin’s whole school went on a big end-of-the-year trip.  From the descriptions and the pictures, it seems like they had a great time.  (There were pony rides!)  Alas, B wasn’t able to go — he was way too sick that week.

He’s been a little sad about it ever since.  Not constantly or anything, but he’s asked several times if “today” is the day of the field trip (to which I remind him that it already happened) and has commented a few times that he didn’t get to go because he wasn’t feeling too well.

Poor guy.  I know how disappointing it is to miss out on something you were looking forward to, even for a good reason.

before

Yesterday, though, he got to go on a field trip with his class, to a nearby botanical garden.  And he was SO happy about it.

It does sound like a fun day.  They took the bus and the train (he got a seat both times, which was apparently worthy of note).  He dug in a sandbox, played soccer and played on the slide (he climbed up the slide part and then slid down, rather than climbing up the ladder — that was pretty fun, since I usually discourage that).  They played in a maze, saw lots of animals and got to watch bees making honey.

He had a fantastic time.  He came home worn out and happy.

after

I’m so glad he got to go.  It was a highlight of his educational experience so far.  The best part, though?  Having lunch with his friends.  (Usually, we pick him up at noon, which is before lunch is served.  Yesterday, they were out until 3:00, which means he got to join everyone for lunchtime.)  Back in September, I wasn’t sure I’d ever see a day when staying longer at school would be a good thing.  I’m so happy he’s having such a good time.

Grinzing Vineyard Walk

I love being outside, and Vienna gives me lots of beautiful reasons to get outdoors and explore.  Since I’ve seen a lot of the city most immediately around where we live (although, as I learned last week, there’s still plenty more to find) I’m always looking for new places to check out.  That can be tricky, though, since I’m usually exploring with at least one child (and typically a stroller) and I almost always have a fairly tight time limit.  It’s much easier to be relaxed about exploring a new place when you aren’t worried that a wrong turn (which might tack an hour onto your trip) will ruin your schedule for the day, and it can be really daunting to enthusiastically venture out only to discover that my chosen destination is completely stroller unfriendly.

Grinzing

Today, Benjamin had a field trip for school, which meant he wouldn’t need to be picked up until after 3:00, so I had time for a bit of adventure.  I started looking around online and found a paved hiking trail noted as “pram friendly” by the Vienna Babies Club, and best of all, it is located right in an area I’ve been wanting to visit.  Vienna is known for its wine culture.  Vineyards and heurige (wine taverns) are a long standing part of the culture here, and I’ve wanted to check out some of the hillside views of the vineyards since before we moved here.  The walk I found (City Hiking Path 1) winds through and above the rolling hills of some of the vineyards north of Vienna.

This morning, Liam and I set out to explore.  We left early, before it got too hot, and took the 38 tram from Schottentor (right by our house) all the way out to Grinzing.  I looked all around online, and couldn’t find a good description of how to reach the hiking trail from the center of Grinzing, so I just looked it up on Google Maps, and it didn’t seem too bad — just 2 long blocks (or so) from the center of town to join up with the path.  No problem.

Turns out, though, that the first block was STRAIGHT UPHILL.  I’m not really exaggerating all that much.  It was reminiscent of San Francisco — that kind of hill.  Yikes.  But, I trudged up the hill, with its cobblestoned sidewalks, pushing my now sleeping child, only to find that the second block was made of . . . . stairs.  Steep, stone stairs, right back down.  Below me, at the bottom of the hill, I could see the trail, but I couldn’t get to it.  So, I pulled up Google Maps again, and went for plan B.

I didn’t have to go back down the hill (which was good — I at least felt like I’d accomplished SOMETHING) but I had to walk all through a residential neighborhood to go back around to meet up with the trail.  I failed twice more (once due to more stairs, once due to a street with lots of traffic and no sidewalks) to meet up with trail, but finally (almost 40 minutes later) I managed it.  Whew.

Once I found the right place, it was beautiful.  The path wound between the backs of the vineyards (the properties mostly back up to each other, it seems).  The track was wide and paved (if a little steep in places) — perfect for walking with a stroller (or jogging, or biking).  Some of the vineyards we passed were small, just backyards converted for growing grapes, and some were massive farms that disappeared over the crest of the hill.  I saw some beautiful views, a few gorgeous houses, and I really got a feeling of being out in the country (while still in Vienna).  It was pretty much exactly what I was hoping it would be.

But, after my 40 minute hike TO the trail, I was tired, it was getting hot, and the walk was pretty much entirely uphill.

And, since vineyards are pretty much just big farms that grow grapes, it was pretty isolated.

During the course of my walk, I only passed about 6-8 people, and they were all men.  It took me a while, but that started to seem weird to me.  I’m used to running in to all sorts of people when I’m out walking — men and women, young and old.  People are always out walking their dogs, jogging, pushing strollers, out with their families.  After about 20 minutes, I started to feel my distance from civilization and my rusty US-born self-preservation instinct kicked in.  I turned around.

As soon as I headed back, I passed 3 women — one walking (alone), one jogging (alone) and one blind woman (white cane and all) walking with her two dogs.  I think I was being a little paranoid (but I really was in the middle of nowhere, and I trust those instincts, even if they get a lot less exercise here).

With my lessons learned from my overly long trip to the trail,l I managed to make it back to Grinzing in less than 15 minutes (but how did it manage to be mostly uphill on the way back, too?!?).  My walk ended up a bit longer than I’d intended, but it was still a success.  The path itself was great, and definitely stroller friendly.  I wasn’t able to find a really easy way to get to the trail with the stroller, though.

(For anyone trying to reach City Hiking Trail 1 from Grinzing with a stroller, I recommend taking Langackergasse east away from the center of Grinzing.  Take your first major left on to Schreiberweg and your first right onto Arlethgasse.  Right now, the sidewalks on Arlethgasse are under construction, but it’s a quiet street with little traffic.  At the end of Arlethgasse, turn right onto Unterer Schreibergasse — the street ends almost immediately, but there’s a paved path at the end that slopes downwards and will bypass the lower part of Langeckergasse which is impassable with a stroller due to steep stairs on one side, no sidewalk on the other and very fast traffic on a very narrow road.  The path will take you to Kahlenberger Strasse.  Turn left and follow it to Wildgrubgasse.  At the corner of Kahlenberger and Wildgrubgasse, you’re actually on the City Hiking Trail, but to get to the good views, turn left on Wildgrubgasse and continue past the Friedhof Heiligenstadt.)

For myself, in the future, I’ll keep looking for another path.  This one was pretty, but I think I’ll save it for the weekends when I have Dan with me, or at least, the rest of Vienna out exploring the countryside.

Not too fat in Austria

After 2 kids and a few years spent without the rigorous physical activity I was accustomed to as (at different times) a runner, a dance instructor, and a horseback rider, it’s probably not surprising that I’d like to take off a few pounds.  Since Liam will be 2 in September, I really can’t keep blaming him for the current state of my waistline (I will, however, continue to blame the incredible quality of baked goods in Austria).

There are a lot of differences in the way Austrians and Americans perceive weight, approach exercise and relate to food.  Vast differences.  Americans are obsessed with food, weight, physical perfection and judging each other.  Austrians are not.  Austrians love food.  They love to enjoy good food, but they don’t examine and judge every morsel that goes into their mouths (or anyone else’s mouths) the way that Americans do.  It took me almost a full year to grow accustomed to the way Austrians eat . . . and I mean watching them actually eat.  They aren’t ashamed of food.  They don’t hide what they’re eating or pretend they’re not eating it.  They don’t make a show of drinking diet soda or having tiny portions or consuming meals composed entirely of either lean protein or leafy greens.  They just don’t.  They walk down the street, eating ice cream, or a donut, or a sandwich.  They take normal sized bites of normal kinds of foods.  They just eat — it’s not a big deal.  Young, old, fat, skinny — there’s just no shame in the way they approach food.  They seem to mostly eat what they want, and not think about it overly much.  (I suspect my Austrian friends are reading this and thinking, “What are you talking about?” because it’s just so not an issue here.)  They get a lot of exercise but they do it as a natural extension of how they live their lives — getting from place to place, enjoying the beauty of the city and the countryside, or playing games and having fun.  (They also smoke a lot, so that probably helps with the waist measurements, too.)

Americans obsess about food and then pretend not to eat while keeping themselves on ridiculously strict diets (or cheating on said diets) and judging themselves and everyone else they see eating.  We generally try to eat in public as little as possible, and when we do, we make a huge show of having as little as possible and having the “right” thing (or we revel in how much they DON’T CARE what anyone thinks of us and eat indulgently).  Americans regard food as the enemy — constantly trying to figure out which particular food group is the guilty party in torpedoing dreams of size 2 jeans, and exercise is often done for show or out of guilt or because it’s expected.  Americans think about food about a million times more than Austrians, and almost all of what we think about is negative — what we can’t have, how bad something is for us, how “good” we are for NOT eating something, or when, when, when do we get to eat again?  Americans have an obsession with physical perfection (which goes beyond weight issues) that I just don’t see here.

It is a culturally different perspective, and one of the most striking examples is the way that weight is treated by medical professionals.  I’ve been here for over a year, which means that I’ve been to the doctor plenty of times — regular checkups, visits for illnesses and vaccines.  (I even took a course of acupuncture — from my general practitioner! — for about 6 months.)

Today, I got on a scale at the doctor’s office for the FIRST TIME since I moved to Austria.  First time.  In over a year, after many doctors appointments.  And only because I specifically mentioned to the doctor in question (Liam’s pediatrician, of all people) that I’m working on losing weight, and she wanted to help me track my progress.  How’s that for different?

In the US, getting on the scale for the doctor is standard practice for almost anything (except the dentist, I think) and every single doctor you see is going to comment about your weight if you’re heavier than you should be.  In the US, I am considered obese, and I think every doctor I’ve seen (since that’s been true) has commented on it . . . at every single appointment.

Today, I showed up to Liam’s pediatrician appointment sweating, red in the face and in exercise clothes, because I ran the half hour (uphill the WHOLE WAY, oh my goodness) to the appointment.  (It’s been hot in Vienna lately, and I knew if I didn’t get my run in first thing this morning, I wasn’t going to.  The doctor is a runner herself, so I didn’t figure she’d mind.  She didn’t.)  Since Liam was napping when I arrived, the doctor and I chatted for a bit about the running I’ve been doing, my goals and my knowledge.  She commented how great it was that I was running, “because it can help you feel so much better”.  After I sheepishly commented that I have some weight to lose (a point I feel obligated to acknowledge when talking about exercise to a health professional) she asked — ASKED! — if weight loss was one of my goals, or if I was just trying to be more fit.

She had me get on the scale to measure my current weight, just for the purposes of helping me keep track (Liam was still sleeping) and she offered to help me calculate a good heart rate for my exercise to help improve my metabolism.  When I glumly read her my current weight from the scale, she replied, “No!  You mustn’t think of it as a glass-half-empty situation!  This will just help you keep track of your progress.”  (Hmm.  Ok.  I truly have no idea how to respond to that, but it sounds good to me.)  She made a big point of saying I’m “a little overweight” and that I shouldn’t really focus on anything except making an effort to get into a routine of exercising 3 times per week — “Once you do that, it will be easy to exercise for longer and for more exertion, until you’re making the progress you’d like to see.”

It’s really different here.  People see weight differently here.  Or maybe they see it exactly the same but don’t see the benefit in denigrating someone over the weight they’d like to lose.  (On the other hand, I certainly did have trouble finding a pretty dress in my size for the ball, which I wouldn’t have in the US, so there’s that side of it, too.)  In my year here so far, not a single person has called me fat, or obese, or implied anything like it.  In fact, no one has commented on my weight at all . . . except for me.

This isn’t an, “I’m fat and I’m proud of it” kind of thing.  I don’t feel that way.  I”m not happy at my current weight, and I’m taking steps to change it.  But I’m making these changes for me.  They’re not coming from a sense of guilt or obligation, and being free from a sense of shame about how much I weigh makes it EASIER to make these changes.  I’m doing them with a light heart and an open mind.  Not from a place of embarrassment or self-hatred.  (Ok, MOSTLY not from those good places.  I’ve been in Austria for 1 year and I was in the US for 34.  It’s not magic.  But it is a new perspective.)

This is one of those things that I had to step outside of to really be able to see.  The shame, guilt and burden of being overweight, and feeling judged because of it, seemed natural and normal to me until I lived here for a while.  I’m not defined by my weight here in a way that I really, truly am in the States.  I’m able to let go of some of my mental “weight” about it, and regardless of how successful I am in losing the physical weight, it’s a much more comfortable place to be.

Our amazing adventure

Our trip yesterday took a lot out of all of us.  It was beautiful, and I’m really glad we went (it would definitely have been one of those things we always wondered about if we hadn’t done it) but it was long, hot and tiring.  Climbing back on the bike this morning to return it to the rental place took more willpower than I expected.

So today, we rested.  I wanted to keep us all out of the sun and as cool as possible after yesterday — there were times during our trip that I was actually concerned about heat stroke.  It was hot again today (it was 90 degrees in our kitchen this afternoon) so we stayed inside in the air conditioning for most of the day and drank lots of fluids.

For general entertainment (and to keep us from leaving tv shows on all day) I set up a picture slide show with my recent pictures — many of them were from yesterday, but it included pictures from our trips to France and the US, too.

Wow.  What a life we have!  Seeing the pictures like that — visiting Notre Dame, the beach in Normandy, our family in the US, as well as biking through a beautiful river valley dotted with medieval villages* — was amazing.  Actually living it, I sometimes lose perspective on what we’re getting the opportunity to do here.  While we live it, of course we get to bask in the wonderfulness of all of it — seeing amazing sights, visiting amazing places, having spectacular experiences.  But, living it also means dealing with the minutia of life and travel, which can obscure the big picture.

Today, we rested.  And, we got to spend some time stepping back and looking at the last bit of our big adventure.  Life is good.  I feel so fortunate.

*  (Actually, portions of the valley have signs of habitation dating back about 30,000 years . . . and that isn’t a typo.)

Biking Melk to Krems

When we first decided to move to Austria, we sat down and came up with a “wish list” of things to do while we were here.  The very first thing to go on that list was a bike trip from Melk to Krems along the Donau.  (It was something we picked up from watching Rick Steves before we came.)  The trip is close to Vienna, and everything we read about it seemed great — easy, accessible, fun for the kids.  We wanted to get to see some of Austria and get a little exercise along the way.  Never mind that I haven’t been on a bike in about 14 years (as it turns out, it really does come right back to you) — the bike trip went on our list and it’s been a priority ever since.

It required good enough weather to give us a pretty narrow window of the year, and it required enough planning that we couldn’t just get up on a nice Saturday and go, so it kept getting put off.

Well, today, we fixed that.  We rented bikes, took the hour and fifteen minute train ride to Melk and rode 40 km down the shores of the Danube until we arrived in Krems, where we climbed back on the train and rode the hour back to Vienna.

We had a good time.  The area is stunning, in places.  The river is wide, and the towns that dot the river are among the most picturesque I’ve ever seen, one after another, all beautiful.  We saw castles, gorgeous church spires and cute little homes nestled together throughout the Wachau.  The trail is, in most places,a dedicated bike route which is integrated into the landscape — we travelled past farms, through woods, along the river, and right through charming towns.  One of our favorite things was seeing the private homes which had hung out a flag or a sign advertising an available room for rent. Truly, some of the views were the best I’ve seen since living in Europe.  Each town we passed looked like a postcard or a painting.

Part of the town of Melk.

The town of Melk, where we started, is very pretty and its famous abbey is impressive and unique.  We stopped in Melk for ice cream and coffee to help fuel our journey, and it was lovely.  We stopped again, for dinner, just before Krems, and had a lovely meal which included many ingredients from farms we had ridden through or past.  The last part of the trip included sections through vineyards, with views of the hills on one side and the late-afternoon sun on the river and the towns on the other.  It was fun to be outside, and nice to travel under our own power . . . while not being limited to walking-with-a-stroller pace.  The river provided cool breezes throughout the day, and we found at least one place (just as we were entering Aggstein) to rest and fill up our water bottles.

The kids had a great time (Benjamin was the most enthusiastic about the trip and the best attitude throughout the day — the rest of us had at least a few grouchy moments).  The boys shared a double-wide children’s trailer connected to Dan’s bike, and they got along all day.  They loved having the wind in their hair, and looking around at different sights and landmarks.  It was fun.

But, it wasn’t really what I expected, and it wasn’t as amazingly wonderful as I was kind of expecting.  40 km is LONG.  It was not the “entirely downhill” route I had read about (although it was, by far, mostly downhill or nearly flat most of the way).  There were a few significantly brutal hills (one wich, near Schonbuhel, actually required that I get off and walk my bike to the top).  Some sections of the trail were very buggy (probably not an issue during other times of the year) and parts of the trail were alongside very busy roads — some of which had traffic that moved at a high rate of speed.  The trail wasn’t particularly wide, so the proximity of the fast cars made me uncomfortable, especially with the double-wide trailer, and most particularly when another cyclist was passing us.  Some of the trail was actually *on* quiet neighborhood streets — which wasn’t awful, but not what I expected.

Today was hot (hotter than the low-to-mid eighties that were forecast), and long sections of the trail (sections between Aggsbach and Spitz, for example) had almost no shade.  Those parts were hard because the kids got hot and cranky, and there was nothing we could do to relieve the situation.

Our stop for dinner was tasty, but with typical Austrian service (slow) it contributed to us just barely making the very last train back to Vienna.  Overall, the trip took longer than I expected — we left the house just after 9 this morning, and didn’t return until after 10 at night.  The ride itself was over 4 hours, plus a 2 hour stop for dinner, a stop for coffee, almost 3 hours to pick up the bikes and get them to the train station, an hour (plus) up, an hour back … not sure where the other time went (the bikes haven’t even been returned yet — that’ll be tomorrow).  The kids had to be really patient — a lot of sitting still and being passive — on the train, on the bikes, at the meals.  That’s not easy when you’re 1 and 3.

My sweet guys — we were still in Vienna!

Overall, though, the single hardest part of the trip was getting the bikes from Vienna to Melk.  Getting through Vienna (from the rental place to the train station) was harrowing in parts and then fitting the double trailer on the train was difficult (we managed, though).  The bikes, although relatively comfortable to ride, are big and heavy, and hard to maneuver on and off the train. It’s not fun to wrestle them (especially when also trying to wrestle children).

We had a good time.  But, I don’t think I’d recommend this trip to someone else in our situation.  With older kids, I think it would be fun (if they had their own bikes) but then you’d have added stress, especially along the highway-adjacent portions.  For just adults, it’s a fantastic trip, but it was only the fact that my kids get along fantastically and are generally patient that the trip went as well as it did.

That said, if I did this trip (or another like it) again, I’d do some things differently.  I’d bring more water.  I’d rent bikes in Melk (or wherever we were starting from) and either return them to the same place or arrange to have them picked up.  It would have cut hours off the trip and started us off fresh and excited instead of frazzled and worn.  Instead of renting a double trailer, I’d rent one single trailer and a child seat for the back of the bike.  That way, each child would have his own space, and they could switch seats periodically to change things up and give them a new view.  Plus, they’d get good time in with both parents (as it was, I only talked to the boys when we stopped — which was pretty often — or when we ate).  I’d do a shorter trip — I’d pick out the most beautiful section of the Wachau, bike that section, then hop on the train when I was tired.  We didn’t do that because we hadn’t done the reasearch to know what options made sense.  40 km is a lot longer than I thought it was — 25 would have been less grueling.

We really did enjoy ourselves, but it isn’t on the list of things we MUST do again, nor is it on the list of things I suggest for others travelling with their kids.  I’m surprised, because I’ve heard and read such great things about this trip (even from people with little kids).  And, since it SEEMS like such a good idea (see beautiful Austria, at your own pace, and it’s downhill!) I really wanted it to be great.

It was great, but it was more the company that the adventure.

A walk around Vienna

I walk around Vienna all the time.  My own two feet are my main mode of transportation (although I do love the buses, strassenbahns and U-bahns).  I’ve read a bunch of guide books, visited the major sights (more than once), and was even given an evening tour of the Inner City by a 40+ year Vienna local (which was AWESOME).  I’m not arrogant enough to think that I know everything about Vienna after living here for just a year, but I felt like I was pretty well versed about the biggest attractions, especially those in closest proximity to my home.

Yesterday, I learned a whole bunch of new stuff.  A few weeks ago, I bought Rick Steves’ Walk:  Vienna City Center for my iPhone.  I’d been researching and buying several of his travel guides for upcoming trips, and saw that he had this walking tour of the center of Vienna — exactly where I live.  It was $2 to download it to my phone, and I thought it might be fun to share with guests when they came to visit.  So, I bought it.  (We first “discovered” Rick Steves just prior to moving to Austria, and we’ve been dedicated fans ever since. Significant parts of our travel philosophy, as well as the priorities and itineraries for nearly all of our trips have been significantly influenced by what we’re read in his books and on his website).

Yesterday was a beautiful day, and I wanted to walk around the city a bit.  I only had about an hour until it was time for B to come home from school, so I didn’t want to go too far afield.  On a whim, I downloaded and followed the walking tour.  It was fantastic.  I learned something new about each of the places I visited.  I learned details about Austrian history, long distant, as well as more recent.  I was reminded that Austria was founded in the 10th century and I learned that a condition of Austrian independence after World War II was its promise of permanent neutrality.  I found out that one of the main shopping streets in Vienna is one that the Crusaders marched down in the 12th century.  I found a display of images showing the startling damage to (and impressive structural integrity of) St. Stephen’s Cathedral in 1945.  And I did it all within about a half a mile of my front door.

I’m so glad I acted on a whim and took that walk yesterday.  I had a wonderful time.  It was really fun to be a tourist in my own backyard, and it was a humbling reminder of how massive the history of this city is, and of how little I’ve been exposed to.  Rick Steves is awesome.  He’s the best tour guide I’ve ever had.  And Vienna is amazing.  There’s still so much to learn.

All about me

I should know better.  I know how my mind works (kind of) and I’m really starting to be aware of my limitations.  (I’d like to be aware of them in time to do something about it, but that’s still a work in progress.)  The last two nights, combined, I’ve gotten less than 8 hours of sleep.  Today, I was busy from the time I woke up this morning until just now, after I put Liam down to bed.  I went straight from being with the kids all day to finishing up our taxes to dinner to bathtime to bedtime with hardly a moment to catch my breath (the overlaps in nap time lasted 14 minutes today — that was my total time to myself).

During bathtime, Liam was refusing to sit down, turning the water on again and again, splashing everything and everyone.  He then launched himself at Benjamin, scratching his chest pretty badly, and I didn’t handle it gracefully.  He was too much for me, in that moment.  So, I took him out, dried him off, announced to Dan that Liam was “being a monster” and told Benjamin I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to continue to give them baths any more since they wouldn’t listen (which was altogether unfair, because although Benjamin was laughing at and encouraging Liam right up until the scratching, he really was being pretty well behaved).  That made him cry.

Liam then proceeded to pee on the floor (come on, like you didn’t see THAT coming), which was followed by me snapping at Dan for putting the “wrong shirt” on Liam, repeating that Liam was a monster and growling at Dan for something else before realizing I truly did not have a handle on myself.  I excused myself for a few minutes, got myself together enough to read a few stories, say a pleasant “good night” to Benjamin, apologize for acting horribly, and put Liam down to sleep.

Yes, I know it could have been much worse.  But I hate it when normal mom stuff gets to me.  It’s one thing when I’ve had an extraordinarily difficult day — if the kids are sick, I’m sick, we’re jet lagged, or something out of the ordinary and stressful is happening, I can give myself a break — but today was just a normal day.  Actually, it was a really pleasant day (until about 8:30 this evening).

I’m upset with myself for making it “all about me” in that moment, for focusing on the fact that *I* was overwhelmed, tired and grouchy.  It really isn’t all about me, and I hate knowing that I upset, worried, and maybe even scared my kids out of selfishly indulging myself in a moment of “Oh, yeah, well Mommy is having a hard day, too!”  I hope they can understand that these moments happen because of a deficiency in ME, not because of anything they’ve done (but that isn’t how it works, and they’ll almost certainly take it very personally).

I’ve been through this before.  I know I can’t go for 16 hours without taking a few minutes for myself (even if I don’t have any time *by* myself, I can turn on some TV for the kids, have a cup of coffee, stare at the walls and pretend I don’t hear anything that doesn’t sound emergency room worthy for 15 minutes).  Why can’t I remember that BEFORE I fall apart?

I got a ton of stuff done today.  Well, whoop-dee-doo, since the overall consequence is that I fell apart as a mom this evening.  Ugh.  Seriously, I have to get better at this.

Family Fest

Today was “Family Fest” at Benjamin’s school.  It was basically an “end of the year” (not quite, because it’s preschool and actually goes all year) party/social/open house for the kids and their families.  As with pretty much everything we experience here, we really didn’t know what to expect.  We were excited, though — Benjamin’s only remaining regret about school is that we don’t all get to attend with him, and today, we got to join him.  So that, in itself, was something to look forward to.

Family Fest was awesome.  The teachers had set up 9 “stations” around the school, scattered throughout the different classrooms and the garden, all set up around this year’s theme (water).  Even though it was chilly and drizzly today, we had a fantastic time.  Everything was very interactive, and encouraged the kids to play (and, often, the grown ups to play with them).

I got to paint Benjamin’s and Liam’s faces (the results were significantly better on Benjamin since he held still and didn’t immediately try to wipe the paint off).  We got to “fish” (magnetic fish and magnetic poles).  Benjamin got to throw water balloons — actually, Liam did, too, but that was less official (and we were glad we had put him in a raincoat).  B got to knock stuff over with a spray bottle of water.  We went fishing for floating ducks.  Benjamin and Liam did some bowling.  We did a treasure hunt for candy in a box full of seashells (that was probably the most difficult one — I’m not sure B really believed there was anything worth finding in the box, and he lost interest until Mommy came to the rescue and uncovered the candy).  We made a paper boat.  We had a snack (cake, juice and coffee — no coffee for the kids).  B put out a “fire” — he knocked over plastic bottles decorated as fire with a hose while I pumped the water.  The boys had ice cream.  We went home.

Good times were had by all.

Family Fest was wonderful, and fun (if a little exhausting) and I feel so lucky that we all got to be there.  (Not all the kids had family to be there.  There was one room where the kids whose families weren’t there were all playing together.  They really did look like they were having a good time, and the teachers who were in there seemed to be making it fun.  But I don’t care how fun it was, that had to be hard.)  We are so lucky.  I got to be there.  Liam got to play.  Dan was able to take the afternoon off of work and be there (and because he was there, Benjamin got some great time and attention from each of us today — wrangling both kids would have made that much harder).  I feel so grateful that the teachers and the school put their hearts into making such a fun day for all of us.  And I feel so fortunate that we could all be there.

We had such a wonderful time.  I loved watching Benjamin talk to his friends and his teachers.  I loved watching him play, and getting to play with him.  I loved watching Liam alternate between enthusiastic play and attempts at enthusiastic destruction.  It was, in all seriousness, probably my single most favorite thing that we’ve done since we’ve been here.