So, I almost forgot to be St. Nicholas last night. No, I actually forgot — just before bed, Benjamin asked, “So, does St. Nicholas come tomorrow?” I’d been talking to him about it for a few days, I’d done all the requisite shopping, but yesterday afternoon it slipped my mind.
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Two steps forward, one step back
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By nature, I love efficiency. I like to spend a little extra time planning in order to save myself time executing the plan, I like to expend as little energy to be as productive as possible — I like to maximize both my time and energy. I’m really good at it. I can pack activities, chores and errands into a day as well as I can pack the back of a car for a vacation.
Meeting St. Nicholas
I’m still a little under the weather, but I’m not letting it stop me — we’ve only got 3 weeks (eek!) until Christmas, so I had to get stuff done this weekend, regardless. I crafted an intricate schedule for both Dan & I for the weekend — maximizing time for cleaning the house, getting shopping done, and (hopefully) still having a good time, all while managing both kids. Of course, by 9:00 Saturday morning, we’d already blown the schedule, but it still got us through the weekend pretty well. Dan (almost single-handedly . . . or worse, actually, because Liam helped) got the house cleaned up and vacuumed, while I got our Christmas decorations out and got a significant chunk of our Christmas shopping done.
Candles, pumpkins and a clock
It’s funny the things that give us the holiday spirit. I’ve been sick for most of the past week, and that’s made me feel really behind in terms of getting ready for Christmas — especially getting my house ready. I still had my Halloween decorations out — it’s hard to feel like it’s getting to be Christmastime, even with our advent calendars out, while looking at pumpkins.
Christmas pajamas
Shortly after becoming a mom, I inadvertently started a Christmas tradition with my kids. Every year, I buy them a new set of Christmas pajamas (at least, that’s the idea — I think they’ve each ended up with at least two sets every Christmas so far). I didn’t set out to create a tradition, I just really love Christmas pajamas (actually Christmas clothes of any kind). It wasn’t until this year, when I almost didn’t buy them, that I realized I’d been doing it all along without thinking about it. They’re like Advent pajamas — I get them out after Thanksgiving, and they’re another fun part of anticipating the holiday and enjoying the season. And, seeing them dressed in their fleece or flannel coziness on Christmas morning is just another warm & fuzzy aspect of the holiday.
This is our fourth year of Christmas pajamas, and I’ve grown really fond of the tradition. This year, Benjamin helped me pick out the pajamas I got for Liam, which added another nice aspect to it. I can imagine us continuing this tradition over the years to come, until both boys are old enough to roll their eyes about it (but secretly look forward to it).
With my boys in their Christmas pjs, it really is beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here, even though our decorations aren’t up yet. We’ve gotten all of our Christmas stories out, too, so bedtime is really becoming quite festive. This year, we’re going to add yet another set of traditions to our family, with the addition of St. Nicholas and some of the Austrian aspects of celebrating Christmas. I love our family traditions that we already have, and I can’t wait to see what new pieces we add this year.
Surprise excursion
A few weeks ago, Benjamin’s class at school went on a field trip. He was effectively uninvited, which bothered me a little, until I realized that he didn’t want to go. Their concern was that he was just starting to adjust to school, and they were worried that adding the stress of leaving the school, without us, might undo what progress we had made (and make him have an unpleasant time, too).
So, it was all for the best that he didn’t go last time. I was a little disappointed that he didn’t get to participate (they went to a farm and selected pumpkins) but it was ok.
This was only a month ago, so we were shocked today when Dan showed up at school to pick Benjamin up . . . and his class wasn’t there, him included. Dan was a bit stunned, and so was I when he let me know. The staff member he originally spoke to only spoke German, so he had to find someone else to find out what had happened. Apparently, they had a class excursion planned for today — to an Advent market. They put a notice on the class bulletin board a few weeks ago. Which sounds fine, except that we don’t really read German, and we had been assured by the staff that they would make sure to explain anything important (like taking our kid somewhere) to us personally.
Well, they didn’t. One of Benjamin’s teachers, who didn’t go on the trip, very sheepishly apologized to Dan and said, “We forgot to tell you”. They dropped the ball, no question.
I was worried. Was he scared? Worried? Freaked out? Cold (I hadn’t dressed him to be outside all day)?
But, when he got back, he was perfectly happy. He says he had a great time, he rode on the bus and on the train, he held the teacher’s hand the whole time. The Christmas market was great — they ate chocolate. He says he got a little cold, but he really seemed unfazed by it.
After we got over the initial shock, and after resolving to always read the bulletin board in the future, (in German or not — we can at least see which dates to ask follow up questions about) we realized that in a way, it’s not entirely a bad change. Just a month ago, they were so worried that Benjamin would freak out that they specifically asked us to keep him home that day. They’re obviously not worried about it anymore. It’s also a sign that we’re becoming just “some of the parents”, rather than “those American English speaking parents”, since they didn’t make a point to pull us aside and translate the notice for us. As much as it freaked us out, we would have given our permission if we’d known.
Don’t get me wrong — I don’t want to see this repeated. The phrase, “Where is my child?” is something I’d like to never say again. But Benjamin had a good time today, and I’m glad he got to be included with his class. I just wish someone had told me it was going to happen.
The backwards Christmas
My usual Christmas preparation schedule goes something like this: start thinking about Christmas gifts in August, start shopping in October, suspend shopping for a bit while I plan Halloween and help with Thanksgiving, set up the house in late November, get the tree in early December, finish decorating, wish I had sent Christmas cards, then begin a wild dash to get my shopping finished (starting around the 10th of December) and wrap everything starting about the 21st. Usually, pretty successful (except for Christmas cards, which I always seem to start on too late to actually accomplish).
This year, I have to do everything differently. I still started thinking about Christmas gifts in August, but I didn’t start shopping, because I wanted to wait to see what would be available at the Christmas markets, which didn’t open until mid-November. I started shopping a few weeks ago, but I’m finding that I’m already way behind — stuff that I’m getting for my boys from the US has to be on its way SOON if it’s going to be under the tree (first it has to get here, then it has to get through customs) and the things that I’m sending home have to be on their way soon for the same reasons. I didn’t count on so many of the things I planned to shop for not being available here. And, not only do the toy stores here just not carry a lot of American items, they don’t stock items like they do at home — there aren’t 100 of everything “in the back” — they have what they have, and when it runs out, it’s gone. (I already purchased something I really wanted for Liam and was lucky to get the last one — and that was 2 weeks ago.) The result is that I’m in danger of stressing to the max about Christmas gifts, and it isn’t even December yet.
I know it’s not that big of a deal — if I get really stuck for a gift for someone at home, I can always order from a US company (oh, how I miss quick and free shipping — the USPS is a wonder I never really appreciated) and if I really need something for the boys, I can always shop in person at a store here and hope for the best. It’s more that my rhythm is off than anything — I have a way of doing things that works for me, and I simply can’t do things that way. (That’s been true of dozens of things here, this is just one more.) The holidays really aren’t about the gifts.
Oh, and I still have to figure out the whole St. Nicholas thing, because apparently he comes NEXT WEEK and I have no idea what kinds of things Benjamin will be expecting, because he’s been hearing about St. Nicholas at kindergarten. I don’t want him to feel like he’s missed out on something his classmates are all talking about at school next week. (I don’t even know if St. Nicholas comes overnight before or after St. Nicholas Day . . . I have some homework to do!)
I haven’t started decorating the house yet, and it’s not even possible to purchase a real Christmas tree (as opposed to one that comes in a box) yet, because they typically decorate the trees here on Christmas Eve. Add to that the fact that I don’t even know where I would buy one, I don’t have a car (and I can’t imagine the Austrians would take too kindly to my carrying a tree home on the U-bahn) and I have no Christmas lights yet. (But those are problems for another day.)
It all sounds very stressful, and it is, if I think about it the wrong way. But it’s also really fine. None of that stuff matters all that much, anyway. What matters is that we have a fun, happy, loving holiday season. We’re going to look at Christmas lights (which are amazing here), visit the Christmas markets, bake cookies, open our Advent calendars and get ready for Christmas. I have to keep myself in a good mental place to do all of that with joy, instead of with stress, because only doing 10% of it, but doing it with joy, will make a better holiday (for all of us) than doing 100% of it with stress.
I just have to keep remembering that. And I’d better look up the St. Nicholas thing.
Undocumented sick time
Dan’s new job at the IAEA (he’s been there almost 8 months, so I don’t know if it counts as “new” anymore) has a lot of great benefits that we aren’t used to from home: more vacation time, more sick leave (actually a nearly infinite amount, if he goes in and gets declared “sick” or “injured” by the IAEA nursing staff), use of the UN commissary, a housing stipend and a higher salary (plus cool things like paid paternity leave, which we don’t plan to take advantage of, but which I really, really, REALLY wish we’d had when the boys were born). It also has “undocumented sick leave” which means taking sick time without going in to see the nurse — usually used when the spouse or children are sick. I am so grateful for this kind of sick leave.
In our previous jobs (since we’ve had kids — before that it wasn’t an issue, because if I was sick, I used my own sick leave and just stayed home) we had to ration Dan’s limited sick leave across the entire family. Because, frankly, it’s not like it’s realistic for me to have a restful sick day at home while I’m watching two healthy kids — and it’s worse if they’re sick, too. Now, we don’t have to worry about “saving” sick leave in case Dan were to get sick — if he gets sick, he can just go in and get it approved and come home. We only have to ration the sick leave between the days I might get sick and the days I and the kids might get sick at the same time.
I’m really appreciative of it today. Last week, Liam was sick with croup, and Benjamin had a cough and a cold. This week, Benjamin is nearly better, Liam is getting better and I’ve been getting sick. Yesterday, I managed to get through the day just feeling run down, but today, I just couldn’t have done it. I have a nasty sore throat and I’m completely worn out — one of those days where you sleep about 6 daylight hours and then sit at the dinner table, feeling miserable and trying not to fall asleep in your meal.
So, Dan stayed home. Even though he knows it’s ok to use this documented sick time, he couldn’t help but stress about the things he’s leaving undone at work. So, it was even better that his boss sent him an email today saying, “Stay home, take care of your family, do what you need to do”, which helped him to relax and focus on being here. (Dan’s boss has sent such an email every time Dan has stayed home with us, which I think is infinitely cool of him.)
I am so glad Dan was able to be home today. I am so grateful I was able to rest and work on getting better. Other than feeling crappy, I’m feeling really lucky.
Gingerbread
‘Tis the season for many things — decorations, lights, music, holiday shopping (which means Christmas markets here in Vienna) and lots of festive foods and drinks. Punsch is particularly popular here (we’re not entirely sure what it is, and it seems to vary by vendor, but it appears to be rum or vodka and a little bit of fruit juice, served warm), as well as hot chocolate, mulled wine, cookies and gingerbread. Lots and lots of different kinds of gingerbread.
To me, gingerbread is something that makes little houses which are fun to decorate (theoretically — I haven’t actually done it in years) or a flavor that goes into a latte. I did buy some mix last year and make a few gingerbread cake men (very yummy) but I honestly hadn’t given a lot of thought to gingerbread in my life.
In Vienna, gingerbread is a big deal. There are entire shops at the Christmas markets devoted to nothing but different kinds of gingerbread — cakes, loaves, cookies. At the Christmas market closest to our house, there are *3* gingerbread shops. (Think about that for a minute: 3 shops that only sell gingerbread. Seriously.)
A few weeks ago, Benjamin asked for a treat from one of the gingerbread shops when we were out. He selected something from the case, took one bite, and decided he wasn’t interested. I decided to try it. What he had selected was gingerbread, topped with raspberry jam and coated in dark chocolate. Yup. It’s great. I’ve been converted. Now I love gingerbread.
Now, when we go to the markets, I often make a stop at a gingerbread shop. This past weekend, at the Schonbrunn market, I had to elbow and push my way up through the crowd at the gingerbread shop to get up to the front to see what they had. So, not only do they have dozens of new gingerbread markets around Vienna right now, but you have to shove your way up to the front of the line to get served. They like their gingerbread here. So do I.
I love Christmas in Vienna.
A too-busy weekend
Thursday being Thanksgiving, Dan took Thursday and Friday off (like we used to do at home) so that we could take a long holiday weekend and enjoy the beginning of the Christmas season (even here in Vienna, today is the first Sunday of Advent, so Thanksgiving or no, it’s Christmastime now). It was a great idea, but, as often happens with these lofty and overly rosy images I have of time off as a family, we’re at the end of the weekend, exhausted, off our schedule and a little grumpy.
We had a great time this weekend (really). We visited some Christmas markets, we all got to take naps (on at least a few of the days), we went out to eat for Thanksgiving, we got some chores done around the house (not as many as I’d hoped), some of us got to sleep in a little (Dan and Liam did — I’m not bitter) and even went to the zoo today (and saw the pandas for the first time, which was amazing). It was a fun, packed weekend. The boys rode on rides at the markets, I did a little Christmas shopping, and we got to spend a lot of time together as a family, which was wonderful.
Really, we had a good weekend. Really. But we did too much (and we didn’t even do all of the things we had planned — we do a pretty good job of sticking to a schedule unless it’s labelled “vacation” or “holiday”, in which case everything goes out the window). So, here we are, trying to get ready for our upcoming week and it’s an hour past the kids’ bedtime and they’re just getting out of the bath. We got home from the zoo this afternoon completely exhausted and frozen (never trust a Viennese weather report) and by 8:00 we had two kids (who refused to nap earlier) passed out on the couch — too late to be a nap, too early for bedtime. Benjamin and Liam are still hanging on to the colds they had last week, and now I think Dan & I are getting sick, too.
I’m really glad we had some time off, got to spend so much time together, and took a break from our normal routine to explore and do some fun out-of-the-ordinary things. But this was not the recipe for a restful holiday. I think I need a vacation to recover from my long, holiday weekend.
