Semester break

Posted on January 31, 2014 by admin

It’s our third winter here, and for the first time, we’re going to be taking advantage of the Austrian “semester break”. Semester break is just that — a break between school semesters. Here in Austria, it’s a whole week, typically in early February. All of the school children are out of school at the same time, and it’s traditionally a popular time for the whole family to take a week’s skiing holiday in the mountains.

The boys’ preschool stays open during this time, so our first two winters here we never knew it was coming until it was already happening. At some point in February we would turn up to drop B off at school and be confused about where so many of his classmates had gone. It was no big deal, though — B would have a small class for the week, and we went on with life as usual (and if we wanted to go skiing, we just went whenever we wanted to).

This year, though, B is allowed a limited number of days off, and although that number (3 weeks . . . not including sick days, 2 weeks for Christmas vacation, a week for Easter and a week for the semester break) seems generous in comparison to the number of vacation days an American child could take, this restriction has kind of hindered our holiday planning this year. So this year, we decided to take full advantage of the “free” days off he’s allowed during semester break — though the school is open, he isn’t required to be there, and these days off won’t count towards his 3 week limit of days off — and we’ve planned to “go on holiday” (my kids “go on holiday” now, they don’t “take a vacation”).

So, we’re taking a week, starting today. We have no specific plans, but lots of good ideas. With the busy pace of the holiday season, we thought we’d take a week and just relax, and maybe enjoy some of Vienna. We may go skating, go to the zoo, take a day trip out of the city for some skiing … or maybe not. We might just snuggle up on the couch, watch movies and play video games. Whatever we do, I’m looking forward to the week spent together, doing whatever fun stuff we might choose. (And yes, we’ve been totally converted to the European attitude towards time off — more is definitely better.)

Girls’ weekend in London

Posted on January 17, 2014 by admin

I interrupt my heartfelt reminiscing about our Christmas at home … with a trip to London! This evening I’ll be flying over to meet a friend for a girls’ weekend. We’re going to see a show, take in as many sights as we can, do the Harry Potter tour and probably have a pint in an actual pub (though Pam will probably opt for a glass of wine).

It is my very first time doing anything like this since I’ve been a mom. It will be the first time I’ve ever spent the night away from Liam, and the first time I’ve ever been away from either of them overnight just for fun (I came to Vienna from the US for a weekend before we decided to move here — before Liam was born — and was away from B overnight when Liam was born). So this is really strange for me.

I’m half thrilled and half anxious. I’m struggling to comprehend traveling on my own and am already feeling how much I’m going to miss my boys. I can’t wait to see my good friend and explore an exciting city together and I’m hoping the boys have so much fun having their guys’ weekend with Dan that they barely notice I’m gone. This all feels very grown up and sophisticated. There’s really no way to say, “I’m meeting a girlfriend in London for the weekend” without sounding very fancy. But I don’t *feel* more grown up or fancier than usual, so it does seem a bit strange.

It’s a little weird to me that I’m going so far away for my first weekend away. But I think that’s because it’s an international flight — really, though, it’s only a 2 1/2 hour trip. I’m not actually going that far. In a way, it’s probably good that there’s a plane ride between me and my boys — it will help to discourage any middle of the night urges to just go home (though I do expect that the desire will still surface).

The boys keep asking who is coming to stay with them. We keep reassuring them that Dan will be here the whole time. At first, I thought they were confused (why would Mommy go and Daddy stay?) but I got the impression today at lunch that they understand just fine that it’s only me who is going — they just want to know who ELSE is coming to take care of them. They keep asking if our downstairs neighbor (our regular babysitter) is coming over to take care of them (which came from a conversation where Dan & I were discussing that she’s offered to be “on call” in case he needs help at any point). They just can’t seem to quite accept that it’s going to be JUST them and Daddy this weekend. (That’s ok — I’m not sure I can quite accept it either!)

So off I go to live it up for 62 hours in London. I’m sure we’re going to have a great time and make some fantastic memories. I guess it’s the consequence of being a mom, but some of the things I’m looking forward to the most are some of the simplest — sleeping all night (maybe even sleeping past 7:00 in the morning!) and being able to choose restaurants based on what I want to eat. That, plus spending time with a good friend, should make it an excellent weekend. (It remains to be seen whether I’ll be able to relax, or if I’ll spend the majority of the time worrying about what’s happening at home!)

Gifts on Christmas Eve

Posted on January 16, 2014 by admin

Christmas in Vienna is lovely, and both times that we were there for the holidays we had a very nice (if very quiet) time. But nothing compares to Christmas with family.

The lead-up to Christmas Day in Vienna truly is wonderful. I’ve been completely won over by the coziness of the Christmas markets, the grand yet warm feeling of the lights hung over the busy streets and the peacefulness of focusing on togetherness and family over shopping and buying. I absolutely love it. I’m a convert. I hope to carry part of Christmas in Vienna with me my whole life. I hope that I have been fundamentally, irreversibly changed by experiencing it.

Christmas at home, surrounded by a bustling family, is where my heart really lives, though. Getting a tree, wrapping gifts, gathering for meals, watching my boys put the star(s) on the tree and spending the days leading up to Christmas Day playing and talking together — it was exactly the holiday I wanted to have.

Christmas Eve itself was a whirlwind of dinner, bath time, hanging stockings, sprinkling “reindeer food” on the lawn, leaving a snack for Santa, reading “The Night Before Christmas” and then tucking two very excited boys into bed a few hours later than I’d planned.

And then we elves went to work! The wrapping was mostly done, but all of the gifts had to be pulled out from where they’d been hidden away, batteries had to be put in place, everything had to be set out just right and we had two firetrucks with over 100 pieces each that needed to be assembled (thanks for that, Santa). It was a big job, but since this was our sixth Christmas as parents, Dan & I are not strangers to the late-night Christmas Eve gift assembly party. But this time, it really WAS a party. My brothers and sister came over and we all stayed up until well after midnight to fit tiny firehoses into brackets and figure out how to put together front-end wheel assemblies for the remote control options. Truly, nothing says “I love you” like putting together 177 pieces of plastic in the middle of the night.

It was great. It was festive. It was togetherness. Although they don’t yet appreciate it, my boys were on the receiving end of a lot of love from their whole family that night. After a couple of years of doing Christmas mostly on our own, there was an amazing sense of joy and celebration just in getting together to play Santa for Benjamin and Liam. I absolutely loved it.

And, around 1:00, when I was picking up the last little cardboard pieces, making sure the instructions were squirreled away, and turning off the lights, I realized that back in Vienna, Christmas morning was already over. Had we been in Vienna, instead of in Maryland, we would have been already finished with opening most of the gifts, and we would be impatiently waiting to talk to our family back home, to wish them a Merry Christmas and to let the boys share their excitement over everything Santa had brought for them. And that always has been one of the hardest things about celebrating Christmas far away. The time difference is more noticeable on Christmas Day than any other day of the year, because when we want to be celebrating and sharing it together, everyone at home is still sleeping . . . and by the time they’ve all gotten together to have Christmas dinner, we’re already on our way to bed in Vienna.

So that moment, the camaraderie of an evening spent constructing toys and the anticipation of the Christmas morning still to come, was pretty magical. Even being in the same time zone as our family would have been special enough, but getting to actually be together to celebrate was the best thing I could have gotten for Christmas this year.

Lumberjacks

Posted on January 14, 2014 by admin

For many years, we had the habit of foregoing the Christmas tree lot and heading out to rural Maryland to select and cut down our Christmas tree. The habit started with my dad, who almost always gets his trees this way (you certainly can’t beat the freshness, but the hour or so home with the tree tied to the top of my little car — part of it on major highways — was always a bit of a harrowing adventure).

I think the last year we did it was Benjamin’s first Christmas. That particular year, instead of taking cute pictures of our little baby in front of his first Christmas tree at the tree farm, we ended up with a screaming, miserable wind-blown baby with whom I retreated to the cold car where then proceeded to accidentally bang his head on the car door (which wasn’t the fault of the location) and we spent a miserable hour waiting for Dan to choose and retrieve a tree on his own. (Note, the tree in the picture is not “our” tree. We posed this picture at the end so we would have something to show for our efforts . . . other than just the tree.) That corrected my romantic notions about tree-felling with tiny children, and afterwards, while still in the States, we relied on the local tree lots for our trees.

I still really like the idea of cutting down our own tree, though, and, had we stayed in the US, it would only have been a matter of a few years until we had most likely returned to our yearly familial trek to the countryside for a tree.

In Vienna, though, that hasn’t been an option for us. Without a car, finding a place to get a tree and (more importantly) getting it home would have required entirely too much effort. (Although I did recently see someone transport their tree by city bus, and there was a lady who checked in a tree as luggage at the airport, so maybe I just didn’t think hard enough about a solution.) So, since we’ve been in Vienna, we’ve satisfied ourselves with the super-convenient tree lot across the street from our apartment building.

This year, since we spent the holidays in Maryland, we didn’t get a tree for our apartment in Vienna at all. It was strange not to have one. Decorating, and then enjoying, a festive tree is one of my favorite parts of the Christmas season, and I don’t follow the Austrian tradition of getting one at the last minute. I always want to have as much time as possible to enjoy it before (and after) the holidays. But I couldn’t think of a way to really make it practical to have one this year, since we were gone for 2 weeks, and Christmas trees aren’t even available here until mid-December. So we didn’t get one of our own.

With our trip home this year including an arrival shortly before Christmas (late on Dec. 20), my mom had already gotten and beautifully decorated her tree. It was like magic for the boys when they saw it (I get my high standards for tree decorating from my mom, but she’s had more practice). They absolutely loved it — especially because it was their job to put the finishing touches on. I think *not* having one ourselves this year made it even more special to arrive at Grandma’s and to have one so beautiful to enjoy.

The boys really got the best of both worlds this year, though, because the day after our arrival we headed out to cut down a tree with my dad. Although Benjamin had technically been on such an adventure before, he had no memory of it, and Liam had never been. We were so fortunate to have amazing (if not very Christmassy) weather for it — we didn’t even need our coats!

It was so much fun to watch the boys rush off to find and inspect trees. Liam nominated the very first one that we saw. They chose big ones and small ones, of several different types. (They had a strong preference for “soft” ones that they could touch or hug without getting hurt.) After a bit of dashing about, nominating trees, and befriending a little boy they met (they were simply FASCINATED that he could speak English!), with Grandpa’s, Sam’s, Margie’s and Adam’s help, we finally chose “the tree” for Grandpa’s house this year. The kids were thrilled.

And then, to top it off, Benjamin actually got to get down on the ground and help Grandpa with the saw. He cut down his very first tree! And then, he was so proud that he pretty much pushed Uncle Adam aside when it was time to carry the tree back to the cashier. Both boys were so proud to be able to help.

And so, the boys got to play lumberjack, and they got to take part in a piece of Christmas tradition I’d been wanting them to experience. I suspect that in the years to come, whatever we decide to do in terms of acquiring our own tree, going and hunting down a tree with Grandpa is doing to remain high on their list of favorite Christmas traditions. (I don’t think that true December weather will even dampen their enthusiasm at all!)

Our journey home (for the holidays)

Posted on January 13, 2014 by admin

I was a little apprehensive, after a year and a half of only relatively short flights with the kids, about our very long trips home and back across the Atlantic. Circumstance (and winter weather) meant delays — long hours waiting on the plane or at the airport — which didn’t make it any easier. Even so, I was pleasantly surprised at how well we all fared on our journey.

Before we even got underway on our trip to the US, we saw something at the Vienna airport that I’d never seen before (and wouldn’t even have thought possible). While we were waiting in line to check our stroller at the oversize luggage line (we opted to check the stroller at check-in, since the boys were riding their Trunkis) we saw that the woman ahead of us was waiting to drop off … a Christmas tree! Surely, you can’t check a Christmas tree as luggage?!? But apparently, you can, because that’s just what she did. The luggage guy did look a bit surprised, but he checked that it was tagged with a destination and accepted it. Amazing! Although I wish I had a) taken a picture, b) found out the destination (wouldn’t there be import restrictions on trees?) and c) been able to see how well it came out at the other end!

The first leg of our flight was delayed due to the inbound flight from Paris being delayed before departure, and then further delayed (once we were on board) due to de-icing. All of which resulted in an eventual dash through Charles de Gaulle once we landed in order to make our connection. I was quite certain our bags wouldn’t move as quickly as we had and that we would arrive in Washington without them.

Not to worry, though, because even after the lengthy boarding process for our plane, there was, evidently, a chip of paint off of the rudder which had to be inspected prior to departure, which resulted in us sitting on the plane, but not moving, for almost 2 hours.

Although that’s always a bummer (although not as much of a bummer as it would be to fly in a plane that wasn’t working properly) we were stuck on the A380 with Air France and, as it turns out, it’s about the best plane it is possible to be stuck on.

Not only is the plane itself incomparably cool (it’s a double-decker with a spiral staircase in back, and each seat has its own on-demand entertainment system) but Air France made it as comfortable as possible by handing out the headphones early and providing snacks. We had games to play and movies and TV shows to watch PLUS we could have charged our iPhones and iPad at our seat if we’d needed to — all of which was a recipe for happy kids (and thus, happy parents) during the delay.

Once we got on our way, flying on the A380 was a little weird. It’s so big that rolling down the runway for takeoff, it felt impossible that we would ever get going fast enough to get off the ground. And then, when it was finally flying, it was surprisingly quiet for something so big.

The trip went very well, and the kids were great. Any worry I had about how they would do was unwarranted. They were amazingly patient, got along well together, and behaved beautifully. Liam had a bit of a crying spell after waking up from a nap (actually, he woke up because we were landing and had to be moved out of Dan’s lap, where he was quite comfortable, into his own seat, which he objected to), but I could hardly blame him for that. (After all, he’s *3* and he just accomplished his 6th and 7th intercontinental journeys. Pretty impressive, really.) In the days leading up to the trip, we gave the kids 3 rules for flying. We’ve said similar things before, but never quite so simply. 1. Whenever the seatbelt sign is on, you have to wear your seatbelt. No exceptions. 2. No kicking the back of the seat in front of you. 3. No yelling. That was it. We reminded them of these rules often in the week before the trip, and it really seemed to do the trick — all we had to do was remind them of the “airplane rules” and they remembered. (Must not forget that for future trips . . . )

The flight was long, and the delays at the beginning took their toll on all of our patience in the last few hours. We had a good journey, though, helped by comfy accommodations, the fascination the kids had with the in-flight moving map display (did you know the outside air temperature at 39,000 feet is -86 F?), lots of electronic entertainment, a few coloring books and stories and many trips up and down the spiral staircase. It was a really pleasant flight. (And I would definitely recommend everything about flying Air France — I wish we’d tried it sooner.)

After a LONG day of travel (over 18 hours, counting the delays and the car travel) and a seemingly endless line at Customs, we were reunited with our family, many of whom we had not seen in over a year and a half. It made every moment in the air more than worth it. It was so very good to see them, and so good to be home for the holidays.

Weihnachtszauber

Posted on December 18, 2013 by admin

I love Vienna at Christmas time. I find that I am able to capture, here, pieces of the holidays that I’d been looking for but couldn’t always find at home. I feel like the focus here is on family, on enjoyment and celebration, with frenetic shopping and consumerism replaced by evenings at the Christmas markets with family or friends.

If I paint an idealized picture, it only reflects how grateful I feel to Vienna. My time here has reminded me what I want from the holidays and shown me what is possible.

We spent a magical evening yesterday at, of all places, the Rathaus Christmas market here in Vienna. The Rathaus market can be a bit touristy and gaudy, and in previous years, has not been one of my favorites. I was won over last night, by taking the kids and seeing it through their eyes.

The trees are all lit up. Not just a little, but with enthusiasm. 10 or so massive trees in the park around the Rathaus are decked out impressively, each in a different theme: hearts, snowmen, teddy bears, stars …. It transforms the park into a wonderland, a larger-than-life fantasy world where 60 three-foot-tall tall teddy bears camp in a tree together. Then there were pony rides with little fingers snuggled into fuzzy coats and a train ride that wove between the decorated trees. Then we had to try the carousel and Santa’s sleigh, all beneath the festive trees and the impressive yet warm facade of the Rathaus itself. The boys were so excited to be entrusted to deliver their tickets for the rides themselves, and I was immensely proud to hear their pleases and thank yous.

With the weather below freezing, we were nearly finished by that point, except for a stop at the market for each of us to choose a special treat. Dan and I had the best hot chocolate in Vienna, while Benjamin insisted on a langos and Liam chose a bag of fruit gummies, which he happily gobbled down right in front of the market stall (to the amusement of the proprietor and several other customers).

We hurried home to get out of the cold, but it was a magical night. Ponies, trains, trees full of light and all of us, together. I hope it was a night that they’ll remember. I hope they, too, can hold on to these beautiful moments of Christmas in Vienna.

Transatlantic

Posted on December 17, 2013 by admin

It’s been a while since we’ve done this. We travel a good bit as a family — in the past year we’ve taken the train to go skiing in the Alps and then the overnight train to Rome, flown to Paris and to the UK and Ireland, and driven to Salzburg and back. The kids are seasoned travelers, and we’re experience travel-parents. We’ve got a lot of miles under our collective belts.

But … we haven’t done this in a while. We haven’t done the 9+ hours transatlantic flight in almost a year and a half, we’ve never done it with a 5 year old and a 3 year old, and we’ve never done it at Christmas. Liam doesn’t even remember the last time we made this trip. With all of my experience with this kind of thing, I’m surprised, but I feel a little unprepared. I feel like I’ve forgotten how to do it.

What do I need in carry-on? What do I need to be prepared for? What do I need to tell the kids to prepare them? How is it going to go? Will they behave/sleep/scream/throw food/refuse to use the airplane toilet? The wiser part of my mind tells me it will be what it will be and that this is one of the (many) experiences in parenting that I cannot truly control. My experience tells me that this trip, like all of the others, will include good and bad elements, and that as long as we arrive safe & sound, all will be well and the less pleasant details of the journey will drift into the corners of my memory. But still, I feel a little nervous.

But even with the nervousness, I also feel excited. Not only are we flying home to see family and friends, but whatever happens, however it goes, I get to spend 9+ hours with my kids, with nothing else that we have to do. Sure, it might end up being a grueling trip, but we get to be together. With the boys in school now, a chance to be with them — to color and talk and read and watch videos, without having to think about running errands or keeping on our schedule — is pretty rare, and pretty exciting.

I’ve also discovered, in preparing for this trip, that packing for a Christmas trip is really a whole different undertaking than packing for a typical 2 week trip. I set about doing most of the packing this morning — getting the clothes together, figuring out which luggage will work best, making piles of laundry still to be done. After getting about 90% of our clothes packed into the suitcases (the rest is still to be washed), I felt quite accomplished. For a normal trip, that’s the vast majority of the work. I was feeling pretty proud about having most of the work done on Tuesday for a trip that doesn’t happen until Friday! And then, I started adding in the Christmas stuff. The stockings, the presents, the treats and sweets. And, oh my, did that ever increase the complexity of the situation. So many of the Christmas things need to be packed “just so” in order to arrive safely. Each item I tried to add to the clothes and accessories already packed required nearly unpacking the suitcase to get everything back in. And I”m not nearly done yet. I’ve probably only packed half of the gifts. Yikes.

The moral of the story is that instead of insisting on bringing truly Austrian things home for everyone for Christmas this year, I should have opted for mail-order. And, for the first time in a while, I feel almost like a rookie traveller again . . . or at least list an uncertain one. I know it will all work though, it always does. That’s the miracle of the last-minute trip preparation, and the miracle of Christmas preparation. With both of them on my side, everything is bound to come together.

Christmas crafts with Liam’s class

Posted on December 14, 2013 by admin

At least once a year, each of the boys’ classes at school takes an evening to invite the parents to come and do some kind of activity with the kids. This year and last year, Benjamin’s teachers (very cleverly) had the parents come just before Lanternfest and help build lanterns. 1 hour, 20 lanterns. Great plan! I imagine it’s more efficient (though not really less crazy) than having the 4 teachers building lanterns with the kids.

Liam’s teachers instead opted for a Christmas activity. They invited the parents to the school Thursday evening to build 5 Christmas crafts with our little ones — and Benjamin was invited to come, too. It was great. We made a placemat using stamps cut from potatoes, strung peanuts onto a wire and made a wreath, wove sticks together to make a candle holder, cut out paper stars to make a napkin ring, and paper mâchéd an angel. (Lots of activites we probably will never do at an American school — metal wires, peanuts, glass candle holders . . . and Christmas.) All in 2 hours, while the kids scarfed down as many cookies as possible from the snack table. (We had a little help from the kids, but in all honesty, Dan & I did a lot of it.) Whew. It was quite a night!

We had a great time, and made some really cute things, but it wore us out! I feel so fortunate to have found this school, and I’m incredibly grateful for the teachers, and the time and effort they put into this kind of thing. I’m also completely amazed at the job they do every single day — after 2 hours of crafts with our two kids, when someone else made all the effort at setting everything up, and Dan & I needed a nap. The teachers do it each day with 4 of them and 20 kids, with a permanent smile and more patience than I have. Amazing. What a great school, and a great night.

The day the sun didn’t rise

Posted on December 11, 2013 by admin

Living at a more northern latitude this time of year really messes with you. The sun rises after we’ve all gotten up for the day and sets well before Dan is home from work. If he didn’t bring the kids home at lunchtime, Dan would never see our apartment in the daylight during the week. It’s even worse for the kids, who still take mid-day naps. They wake up twice every day, in the morning and in the afternoon, but both times in complete darkness. It does a number on their body clocks. The other day, Liam woke up at 4:00 a.m., ready to go for the day — this from a kid that I have to pull out of bed at 7:00 every morning.

Yesterday was a profoundly cloudy day. There were heavy, gray clouds with intermittent rain all day. Liam woke up after nap time (in the dark), and asked, as he often does this time of year, if it was morning or night. I told him it was night (B corrected me and told me it was evening) and Liam asked me, a little sadly, “Why didn’t the sun come up today?”

I get it. That’s totally how it feels. Living here is very dark in the winter, and the days when the sun doesn’t come up at all are a bit of a bummer. We’re in to the darkest two weeks of the year now, though, and then things will be getting a little brighter. (Another plus to going home for Christmas — we’ll spend two weeks of the darkest month of the year much further south, with more daylight!)

Nikolaustag

Posted on December 9, 2013 by admin

Of all of the new holidays we’ve experienced since we came to Vienna, St. Nikolaus’ Day is the one we’ve adopted the most whole-heartedly. At school, St. Nikolaus’ Day is built up and celebrated well, so, of course we’ve followed suit at home.

On the night of the 5th of December, children organize and set out their shoes, and while they sleep, St. Nikolaus comes and fills them with treats and small toys. It’s a tradition much like Santa Claus filling stockings (though in Austria, it is the Christ child who brings the tree and gifts on Christmas Eve). For naughty children, St. Nikolaus does not come (or leaves only sticks), but instead there is the worry that the Krampus (a kind of demon) might come and carry them off instead. (We don’t talk much about Krampus, and the school doesn’t mention him at all, as far as I can tell.) I kind of picture St. Nikolaus’ Day as a pre-Christmas report card — are you doing well enough to get a visit from St. Nikolaus, or will it be the Krampus instead? — while there’s still time to make a change before Christmas. (We don’t use it that way, though — no threats of Krampus.)

The kids love it, and so do I. They wake up to a little bit of chocolate and a small toy or two, then go to school for a big party and another visit from Nikolaus (he brings chocolate, fruit and nuts to school). It’s a magical day for them, and a part of the fun and enthusiasm of the way Austria celebrates Advent. So much of the holidays here are not about Christmas Day, but about the whole season, and that’s a change we really enjoy. We’ve explained to the kids that St. Nikolaus pretty much only visits the children who life in Europe (which is why their friends and family in the US don’t know too much about it) but I suspect that he’ll make a special exception to visit our house, even after we’re living in the States again.

A Mommy Abroad

Our big adventure, as a family of three.

Category Archives: Kids and Parenting