Every time I start to feel like I’m getting good at this whole “living in Vienna” thing, I get a reminder at how out of my element I really am.

I had an appointment this morning to meet with Benjamin’s teachers at school, and we were running late.  I’ve been wanting to sit down and talk to them about how he’s doing — some days he seems to really enjoy school, some days not so much, and since I’m not there when he’s there, I have no idea how well or poorly his days actually go.  I started asking them to set up this appointment back in January, but since we were collectively sick most of February, it kept getting put off.  One of B’s main teachers goes on maternity leave at the end of the month, though, so I’ve been anxious to get the chance to sit down and talk to them soon.

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When Benjamin was very little, he was a terrible sleeper.  He would almost never take a nap unless we were holding him.  He didn’t sleep in the car or in the stroller.  And at night, he’d only sleep if you walked with him . . . constantly.  Dan & I walked miles and hours around our apartment in the middle of the night.  If we tried to sit down, he’d typically wake up and cry.  Most nights, we’d walk with him for a few hours and then finally be able to ease him into his crib, only to be up again with him an hour or so later.  We used to take turns, and we’d cap each “shift” at 3 hours — beyond that, we’d go and wake the other one up — earlier if we were starting to get frazzled (which was easy to do).  Getting him down at bedtime was the worst.

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In less than two weeks, my sister will be here to visit.  I’m so excited, I can hardly stand it.  I haven’t seen her (or any of my sbilings, or my dad, or my stepmother) since we left for Austria last April (and I haven’t seen my mom since August) — it will have been nearly a year by the time she arrives.  I miss her terribly.

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Over the winter, we’ve done a lot of indoor art projects.  There were a few that included fun and messy things like glitter and glue, but mostly we stick to (relatively) clean and orderly art in the winter when we’re stuck indoors — things like dry erase markers, stickers and coloring books.  (I’m working on being less worried about messes in favor of fun, but I’m making slow progress.)  I was more relaxed about this at home, where the house was ours, and I’m more concerned about it here, with parquet floors that we’re only renting.  So, our messiest art projects (like painting on the easel) principally happen outdoors, which means they have to wait for the warmer weather.

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I’ve been staring at my computer for over an hour trying to think of something to say, and I just can’t.  I’ve been trying to switch my mind off of the track that it’s on — to something more upbeat, or clever.  But I can’t.

A friend of mine from Sweet Briar (I don’t know her terribly well, but it’s a small place — we’re all friends) has two little boys.  Carter, the youngest, was diagnosed this past fall with a malignant, inoperable brain tumor.  He’s too little for the kind of radiation therapy typically used on this type of tumor, so they’ve been fighting his cancer with chemotherapy.  He’s 2.  His older brother and dad have been at home, trying to maintain some version of “normal” (which included relocating the family at one point) while his mom has been with him while he gets his treatment (partially administered at St. Jude’s).

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